This Time Won't You Save Me
by got99problems
Summary: Bonnie is stuck in 1994 and her depression has turned into suicidal thoughts. Will Damon be able to save her before she gives up? Bamon fic.
1. Chapter 1

I woke up this morning feeling empty. Not the kind of empty you feel when you haven't eaten all day but the kind when you realize there's no hope. That your life is completely over and there's nothing you can do to change it. Another day in this hell hole, another day of being completely alone. _Another day without Damon….._

I've lost count of the days. There's no point in checking off the numbers on the calendar because I'll be here forever. If I'm being honest with myself, I'll most likely die here. Everybody has moved on with their lives and forgotten about me. I don't blame them though. There's really nothing they could do except mourn me for a little while and then move on.

As much as I miss Damon I don't regret saving him. At least one of us was able to get out and be with the one they loved. I had to look at it this way because If I didn't I would end up hating myself and resenting Damon. I don't want to think that way so I shook the thought from my brain and got up to start my repetitive day.

I always get up, take a shower and get dressed, make pancakes, and find something to do the rest of the day. I gravitated towards the alcohol and drank my way through the afternoon.

I sat at the dining table with tears in my eyes, watching past recordings of Damon and I. I was pretending to be a television host and Damon was my interviewee. I couldn't help but smile through my tears, even though I was far from happy. Looking back on that I realized how much I missed Damon and how much we've grown together.

I never would have thought that I would end up being friends with Damon, let alone loving him. It's crazy how these feelings crept up on me. Slowly but surely I fell for him. And now he's gone and he's never coming back for me. It doesn't matter anyway, I could never compete with Elena, nor do I want to. She's my best friend and she deserves happiness and if that happiness is with Damon then I won't stand in the way.

I still think about Jeremy every once in a while. Wondering how he is, where he is, if he's moved on and found somebody else to love. He and I were good together but eventually things fell apart. I outgrew him in a sense and we lost communication. But he'll always be my first and I'm grateful for that.

Before I knew it, it was nightfall again. I had spent the day drinking and reminiscing. The alcohol was making me sleepy so I put on a random movie and laid down on the couch, snuggling up to my blanket. Lately being asleep was better than being awake so I prayed to fall fast asleep.

For the past few weeks I had been having very vivid dreams of Damon and me. I can't lie and say I didn't like it but it was also strange to have my deepest desires be manifested into these incredible dreams. Some dreams I would wake up and he would be lying in bed next to me and some dreams we would meet downstairs with him over the stove cooking pancakes like he used to.

Tonight I didn't know what I was going to dream about but I knew that as long as Damon was in it I would be happy.

* * *

 _The feeling of soft wet kisses trailing up my back caused me to wake up moaning. My eyes fluttered open to find Damon leaning over me with a smirk._

" _Wake up sleepyhead."_

" _I'm awake now." I couldn't stop myself from grinning._

" _I made breakfast so hurry up and come downstairs." Damon leaned downed and gave me a kiss on the cheek before sauntering off. He looked so sexy with his perfectly imperfect black hair, those beautiful blue eyes, and his plaid shirt was unbuttoned to his middle, exposing his chest. I got up and went into the bathroom to freshen up and quickly made my way downstairs. I came into the kitchen with just a long t shirt and underwear on. My hair was a mess of curls all over the place but I didn't care. Damon grinned when he seen me._

" _Hey," he said._

" _Hey yourself."_

" _You ready to eat?"_

" _Yes, I'm starving and that food smells delicious. What made you decide to make all of this?" Damon had made his usual vampire inspired pancakes but he also added scrambled eggs, bacon, and hash browns. It looked marvelous._

" _Well you always complain about my pancakes so I figured you'd eat it if I made something else with it. Plus you deserve it."_

" _Wow, I could get used to this." I sat down at the table as Damon placed a plate in front of me._

" _Enjoy." He grinned._

 _Before he could pull away I pulled him down to my face and kissed him on the lips._

" _Thank you." I whispered._

" _You know if this is my reward for cooking I should definitely start cooking for you more often." His voice was low and sultry as he bit his bottom lip. I gave him a nervous laugh and my heartbeat sped up. He smiled knowing the affect he had on me._

 _After I took my first bite of food I couldn't stop stuffing my face. Damon sat across from me with a cup of coffee and a newspaper. I looked up when I heard him chuckling._

" _What?" I asked with a mouth full of pancakes._

" _You act like you haven't eaten in days."_

" _I told you I was hungry." I brushed him off._

" _I know it's just I've never seen you eat like a cow." Asshole._

" _I do not eat like a cow!" I can't believe he said that to my face._

" _Alright, If you say so." He put up his hands in defense._

 _I shook my head. "You're an asshole, you know that?"_

" _Yea but you love me." Cocky son of a bitch. He was right though._

" _Maybe I do." I looked down to hide my blushing face._

 _Damon abruptly got up and went to the music player. He slipped in a cd and Salt N Pepa's Whatta Man blasted from the speakers._

" _Dance with me!" He came over and grabbed my hands, forcing me to get up._

" _Damon…" I didn't feel like dancing. I wanted to eat._

" _Oh c'mon just one dance." Fine._

 _I started moving my shoulders and hips alongside Damon. He grabbed me and we swayed until he turned me around so my back was to his front. I started getting more into it and slowly started to grind against him._

 _He put his hands on my hips and moved with me. I put my hands on top of his and we kept at it until he ducked his head and kissed my neck. That sent chills down my arms and I couldn't hide the little sound of satisfaction I made._

 _He continued to kiss my neck and it felt so good I stopped dancing. I turned around and the way he looked at me made me want to jump his bones. I stared into his eyes and he stared back, his eyes going back and forth between my eyes and lips._

 _Suddenly he started moving in closer. He was going slow to give me time to say no or reject him but I didn't. I welcomed it and stood on my tippy toes to meet his lips. We started off slow and sweet but we got caught up in the kiss and he ended up lifting me on top of the counter._

 _I took my shirt off exposing my breasts. He continued kissing me, making his way down my neck. I grabbed the back of his hair and squeezed when his tongue touched my nipple. I was panting, nervous and excited all at the same time. I helped him get his shirt off and he grabbed my thighs to pull me closer._

 _Our chests were touching now, skin to skin. His lips went back to mine but in a rougher manner. He started kissing down my neck again and nipping me along the way. I closed my eyes reveling in the feeling of his lips against my skin. All of a sudden his lips were gone and I felt nothing._

" _Why did you stop?"_

* * *

I opened my eyes to find my surroundings had changed. I wasn't in the kitchen anymore, I was on the couch, fully clothed.

I slowly sat up and came back to reality. _It was just a dream._ My eyes began to burn as tears threatened to spill over.

I looked at the clock and seen it was 7:00am. I dragged myself to the bathroom and ran myself a bath. When I got in the tub I cried my eyes out.

I cried because it was only a dream and that's all it would ever be. I cried because I was so lonely.

I cried because it seems as though I could only ever be happy in my dreams.

This wasn't the first dream I had of Damon and I was sure it wouldn't be the last but I couldn't keep relying on my dreams to make me happy. I couldn't keep doing this.

I was either going to kill myself or go insane. And right now suicide sounded like the best choice.

* * *

Kai, Damon, Elena, and Jeremy all stood in a circle in the middle of the boarding house. Damon was desperate to create a plan to get Bonnie out so he asked the one person he hated to ask.

"You have to be able to do something!" Damon was frustrated.

"Ok, calm down. Here's what I can do." Kai went into his plan of sending someone to 1994 to retrieve Bonnie but the catch was only one person could go.

"Why can't you send all of us?" Elena asked.

"Because I'm not strong enough for that and if the magic overwhelms me and I become too weak, you guys could all end up being stuck there. For good."

"Wait, so you're saying whoever goes over there could potentially not come back?" Elena was worried.

"Yes…that's a risk. But it's not a guarantee," Kai reassured them. "So who's going?"

"I will." Damon and Jeremy said at the same time.

"I'll go, I can get to her and we'll be out quick." Jeremy stated.

"No, _I'll_ go. I promised myself I would get her out of there so I'm keeping that promise. Plus she saved me…I owe her."

"Damon are you sure? This is really risky."

"Yes, I'm sure. She's worth it."

"Ok! Then it's settled. Damon stand by me." Kai wanted to get on with it.

Damon walked towards Kai but Elena stopped him to give Damon a quick kiss.

"Please be careful….and bring my best friend home."

"I will," Damon put his hand underneath Kai's who held the ascendant. "Let's do this."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Finally finished chapter two. Enjoy!**

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

I believe it's safe to say today is worse than yesterday. Ever since I had my latest dream of Damon and me, I've been feeling more depressed.

I can't believe how vivid the dream was. The explicit way he looked at me, the way his hands roamed all over my body. I can't help but blush when I think about it, which happens to be every minute.

I know it was just a dream but it felt so _real._ And I wanted it to be real, more than anything. But it wasn't and now I have every part of it stuck in my head, on replay.

When I'm not thinking about Damon I'm thinking of ways to kill myself. It's awful, I know, but what else do I have to live for? I'm literally alone with no way to get out of here. I'd rather just be dead.

Maybe the pain, the loneliness, the suffering will drift away and I can be at peace. I know it's not like me to give up but the old me is gone.

This Bonnie that I am today is completely **done.** I don't have any optimistic thoughts of getting out or someone coming to get me, I can't rummage a plan to save myself, I'm useless.

It makes me sick to my stomach to think of what my grams would say if she knew what I was about to do. She would be so disappointed in me. She raised me to be a strong woman and fight for my life but there's no more fight left in me. _I'm sorry grams._

I decided to look for any type of pills to take so I could hopefully just pass out and never wake up. Unfortunately I couldn't find any in the house.

For some reason I ended up in Damon's room. I started looking around and going through his things. I felt guilty for snooping but it wasn't like he was going to round the corner and catch me.

I looked all through his room until I finally came to open his closet. Nothing special, mainly filled with black attire, but I happened to see something small in the corner so I reached for it and realized it was just an old box.

When I opened it I gasped. I started down at the small gun for what felt like ten minutes but was really only a few moments. I picked it up examining it, wondering why in the world Damon would have a gun. He definitely didn't need it for protection. The thought almost made me laugh.

I opened it up to find exactly one bullet intact. Could this be the world's way of encouraging me to die? It felt like it. It felt like this gun and this one bullet was left here just for me.

I sat in his room for a few minutes until I decided this would be my way out. I didn't really want my death to be dramatic or violent but this gun was presented in front of me and for some reason I couldn't put it down. At least this way it would be quick. One trigger, one shot, **boom** _,_ I'm dead. But before I do this I have to say goodbye to everyone.

The only way I could do this was through videotape so I put the gun in my pocket and headed back downstairs to retrieve the camcorder. I sat on the couch and took a deep breath before the red light came on signaling me to start talking.

"Hey guys, it's me." Lame start but I don't know what else to say.

"If anybody happens to come across this tape one day, just know that I'll be dead by the time you watch this." I inhaled to keep the tears in.

"The purpose of this video is to tell everyone goodbye. I'm sorry…that things have come to this. I want you guys to know that none of this is your fault and I chose to relieve myself from this misery."

"It's just so hard being here all alone," I was crying now. "And I can't do this anymore, it's too hard." I shook my head.

"Elena and Caroline, I love you, you girls are my sisters forever. Please remember that and don't blame yourself for this."

"Jeremy I miss talking to you…and I hope that wherever you are, you're happy." I tried my best to smile.

"Matt, Tyler, Alaric, I miss you guys as well. Take care of yourselves."

"Stefan I want you to watch over everyone and be the great protector that you are but also don't forget to live your own life. I don't want you to end up like me."

"Mom, I love you. And I forgive you for everything. Please don't be upset with me."

I exhaled heavily, knowing there was one last person I wanted to say goodbye to. This is going to be hard.

"Damon…" I got his name out. Good job Bonnie. "I'm so happy that you escaped this place and now you're free….free to do anything."

"I want you to know that I don't blame you. And in some weird, twisted way I'm glad I got stuck with you for four months. Because If I hadn't...I never would have gotten to know you so well. And I probably never would have fell for you the way I did." Ok, I said it. It's out now. I can breathe.

"I love you, Damon. I don't know how or when or why but I do. You're the most irritating, annoying, witty, funny, crazy, loyal, passionate guy that I know. Somehow you got under my skin and I couldn't shake you." I laughed dryly.

"I know this is crazy because we're supposed to hate each other but I can honestly say you've become one of my best friends."

"So..." How the hell do I end a suicide video? "It's time for me to go. Again, I love you guys and I'm sorry." My voice cracked at the end. I brought my hand to my lips and kissed it to bring it back down to the camera, giving everyone a farewell. Then I shut it off.

I popped open a bottle of alcohol, not even bothering to see what kind it was and began to drink, drink, and drink.

* * *

 **(Damon's POV)**

I opened one eye after being severely blinded by a bright white light. It reminded of me when Bonnie and I died together, holding hands and ready to face the unknown together.

I looked around instantly recognizing my house and started calling for Bonnie. I checked upstairs, looking for any trace of her and found nothing. Maybe she wasn't here but I couldn't think of where else to look besides her own home.

I quickly descended down the stairs and then I caught sight of Bonnie sitting on the couch. I was relieved to know she hadn't left but my relief was instantly altered when I realized Bonnie couldn't see or hear me.

I had tried to talk to her but it was no use. I reached out to put my hand on her shoulder and my hand just sliced through her like she was a hologram. _Dammit. That fucker Kai has some explaining to do._

All I could do was sit by her and I watched her pick up a camcorder, ready to record something. She looked so sad and all I wanted to do was comfort her, tell her that I was there and ready to take her back home but it was impossible.

When she started talking to the camera I frowned, not quite realizing what she was doing until I heard her mutter the words _I'll be dead by the time you watch this._ She went on to explain she was making a goodbye video to everyone and saying sorry.

Tears welled in her eyes and soon they were spilling over. And then it hit me like a full forced blow to my stomach.

 _Bonnie's going to kill herself. Holy shit. What am I going to do? I can't let her do this!_

Panic filled my insides and I tried to get her attention again, knowing damn well it wouldn't work. I stopped to listen to what she was saying. Stefan, Elena, Caroline, she was saying her own little words to all of them. She hadn't said my name so I'm assuming she didn't care to say goodbye to me which admittedly stung a bit.

I got up and started pacing in front of her, trying to touch anything but it wasn't working and then all of a sudden I heard my name. **Damon.**

The way she said it immediately made me stop in my tracks and stare at her. She was happy for me. Happy that I had gotten out and she didn't.

 _How does that make sense?_

She went on to say she didn't blame me and that she was actually glad she got to spend time with me in this weird, copycat of Mystic Falls. A place that I initially thought was my hell but turned out to be Kai's.

In a strange way I agreed with Bonnie. I wasn't happy about dying and leaving behind everybody, especially not with Bonnie but then things got better. We got to talk, actually I talked and she listened most of the time. She was a great listener and always giving me her best advice or wise words of wisdom.

Her positivity was annoying, I'm not going to lie but deep down I appreciated it. Her hope gave me hope although I never admitted that to her. I wouldn't have survived without her and I definitely wouldn't have found my way back in the present time if it wasn't for her.

She sacrificed herself for me and I would forever be grateful for that. She showed me how much she actually cared for me even after all the shit I put her through and I knew I could consider her a true friend.

She seemed to be struggling with her goodbye to me in particular. She would pause, trying to find the right words to say and then she said the thing I never in a million years would have expected to come out of her mouth. She fell for me.

 _I love you, Damon._

My eyes widened with shock and my mouth was slightly open but I couldn't say anything. It's not like she could hear me anyway but I wanted to say something so bad.

 _Bonnie freaking Bennett loves me. How? Why would be a better question. I can't believe this._

 _She's never shown any type of romantic feelings towards me. Not even when I would tease her and flirt with her._

 _This is so fucked up._

 _She's telling me she loves me and all I can do is stand here and stare like a deer caught in headlights. In this moment I was glad she couldn't see me because had she said this to my face I probably would have said something stupid or made the situation more awkward by being silent._

 _My face was still in shock mode but on the inside I was grinning like an idiot. I don't know why but it made me feel good to know she loved me._

 _It feels good to be loved._

 _Let's hope Elena never sees that tape because that would be extremely awkward for all of us._

After Bonnie shut off the camera she sat still for a little while, letting herself digest her words and then picked up a bottle of bourbon and proceeded to drink. She went up the stairs shortly afterwards.

I wanted to run after her but what good with that do. As soon as she left I felt an earthquake. The ground was shaking beneath me or maybe it was all in my head.

Before I knew it I was opening my eyes to find myself surrounded by Elena, Kai, and Jeremy. I was back and had not accomplished diddly squat.

This was all Kai's fault. I was feeling a little dizzy but Elena helped me up and wrapped her arms around me.

"Oh my god are you okay?" she asked.

"What happened?" I wondered.

"I lost my connection." Kai answered.

"I'm fine. But Bonnie isn't."

"What do you mean? Where is she?" Elena automatically thought the worst.

"Hocus pocus over here forgot to tell me that once I was transported I wouldn't be able to touch anything. I darted my eyes at Kai.

"I tried to talk to her but it was no use. She couldn't see me." Jeremy and Elena gave Kai a dark look.

"Oops. I guess that was a failure on my part. I had no idea it wouldn't work, I apologize." Kai didn't sound very genuine to everyone else but they had to think of another plan.

"There's something else," I added on. "Bonnie's going to commit suicide."

Elena and Jeremy's eyes widened with fear. "WHAT?" they both exclaimed.

"How do you know that?" Jeremy demanded.

"I watched her record a video saying goodbye to everyone. She said she couldn't stand being there anymore. She thinks no one's coming for her."

"Oh my god Bonnie," Elena cried. "We have to save her, send her a message, something!"

"There has to be a way to get through to her. Can you try again?" Jeremy directed towards Kai.

"I can try but I'm not guaranteeing anything. This takes a lot out of me so I might not be able to reconnect, at least not today."

"No, I need to be sent back today. She could kill herself at any time, I need to get to her before she goes through with it." I'm not going to let Bonnie die.

"Okay that sounds all good in theory but did you forget when I said I may not be strong enough to reconnect, let alone bring you back."

"I don't care what you have to do just get me back there." I demanded.

"Can you channel Elena and me?" Jeremy wondered. "Will that help?"

"Jeremy we're not witches." Elena shot down his idea.

"No, no, wait he has a point. You're not witches but I can still channel you guys, just not in the same way I could a fellow witch. That might work." Kai smiled.

"Whatever, let's just try it and see." We're wasting time. Bonnie could be dead by now.

Elena and Jeremy held hands with Kai as I stood in the middle around them. Kai began chanting and I could see that bright light coming back. I knew it was working but didn't know what the end result would be from this trip.

* * *

I stood in Damon's bathroom with the gun on the counter top. I kept staring at the gun like it would disappear but it stood right in front of me, taunting me, calling my name.

 _I must be really buzzed if I think the gun is talking to me_.

I don't know why I was stalling, I already made up my mind. I was ready to die.

 _That's not true, I don't want to die. I want to live but what other choice do I have besides staying miserable for the rest of my life?_

I snatched the gun and checked one last time to make sure the bullet was in place. I looked at myself in the mirror and frowned at how distraught I looked.

 _What happened to me? How did I end up like this?_

I couldn't hold in the pain anymore and a sob broke through. The waterworks started again for what felt like the hundredth time today. I'm so tired of crying, I just want this to be over.

I raised the gun to my head in a slow, shaking manner. I couldn't stop crying. My eyeliner was causing black streaks to run down my face. I closed my eyes and held the gun to my head for a minute before I pulled the lever back and placed my pointer finger on the trigger.

 _This is it. Goodbye._

A warm hand grabbed onto mine and pulled the gun down. My eyes sprang open and I turned to my right to see Damon. My eyes were bulging out of my head as I stared at him. He stared back at me for a second until he dropped the gun and pulled me into a hug. I latched onto him for dear life.

 _He's real. Damon is really here._

I cried and laughed at the same time into his chest.

"Bonnie..." he exhaled my name.

"How are you here right now?" I spoke into his shoulder incredulously.

"I'll explain later."

"Damon, can you take me home?" My voice was sort of muffled because I was still hugging him.

He stepped back and bent down to eye level. "That's what I'm here for. I came back for you."

I wanted to kiss him right then and there but that wouldn't have been appropriate. Plus I looked a hot mess.

I smiled at him. "Thank you." I whispered.

"Come on, let's go home." Our fingers linked and the ground began to shake. A bright light overtook my vision until I was completely submerged by it.

* * *

 **A/N: Leave reviews!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I'm back with chapter 3! Honestly I'm not exactly sure how I want this story to play out so If you would like to give me suggestions or tell me what you want to happen, message me.**

* * *

 **(Damon's POV)**

It had been about two weeks since Bonnie's been back and I had barely seen or spoken to her. Things weren't going exactly the way I had pictured they would go.

I thought I would save her, bring her back home and spend time with my new witchy best friend but that wasn't happening.

At all.

In a way I felt she was avoiding me because of her newfound feelings for me but I didn't bother to bring it up. I figured I would talk to her about it after she had gotten settled in school and reentered the swing of things. But I haven't had the chance to seeing as she's always "busy" or "doing something".

I mean how busy could she be? She hasn't been back that long and from what Elena's told me, she's only committing to school as a part time student. Which means something's not right.

I know Bonnie. I spent four months with her. She wouldn't just abandon her friends and family like this if she weren't dealing with something.

I'll found out soon enough. Even if she refuses to tell me I'll drag it out of her. She should know by now not to hide her problems and completely weigh herself down without any help.

 _Bonnie's so strong but she can be really stupid sometimes._

I had planned on visiting her on campus but something came up so I stayed in Mystic Falls. For some reason I couldn't stop thinking about her so I sent her a quick text to check in and make sure she was okay. Of course she texted back but only with a few words.

 _In class. Talk later._

I was beginning to feel like a rejected boyfriend whose girlfriend didn't want to see him because she was creeping around.

 _That probably isn't the best analogy because I am not Bonnie's boyfriend and she is not my girlfriend. Why am I worried about her so much? Oh, that's right, because she saved my life a billion times and so now I can't be a dick…at least not to her._

In the meantime maybe I'll have Elena check up on her. Although Elena hasn't really been able to get through to her either.

 _(Sigh) who am I kidding? I'm going to have to do this on my own. Just like everything else._

* * *

Bonnie's forehead scrunched when she heard the ping coming from her phone, letting her know that she had _another_ text message. She was beginning to become annoyed with everyone checking up on her and treating her like a baby.

Yes, she appreciated her friends looking out for her but she was fine.

 _Lies._

She didn't need to be asked "how are you" several times a day. Everything was okay.

 _More lies._

To avoid a full conversation, she texted Damon back saying she was in class even though she was sitting in her dorm room attempting to study. For some reason she just couldn't concentrate.

She kept rereading the same lines over and over, people kept texting her asking her was she ok, and on top of that her head was beginning to throb as if someone was knocking on the inside of her head.

She decided maybe she needed to sleep. Her sleeping habits hadn't been very well since she'd gotten back. She had nightmares almost every night. In some dreams she was stuck back in 1994 and Kai was chasing her down, while others she was just alone, trying to find a way out.

It kept her up half the night and was taking a toll on her health. She didn't want to admit to herself that she was scared to fall asleep but if she didn't get any sleep she would start to fail her classes.

So Bonnie took some strong Tylenol to ease her headache and she rested her head down on her pillow. Before she knew it she was fast asleep.

 _Bonnie was walking down the streets of Elena's old neighborhood as everything was much too quiet and still. She was alone and needed to get out of the house for some fresh air so she decided to take a stroll down memory lane. Literally._

 _She smiled to herself thinking about all the times she came over Elena's house to play outside, along with Caroline. Those were the good days, simpler times. Ones she cherished way more now than she ever had._

 _Her eyes were on the different houses she was passing by when she noticed a dark figure way ahead of her._

 _She came to a stop and tilted her head. Who could this be?_

 _She took tiny steps moving forward and squinted her eyes to make out a clear image of who was looking at her. "Bonnie!" the person called, and she knew that voice very well._

 _"Damon?" she whispered. "Is that really you?"_

 _She started sprinting towards him before he could disappear and when she reached him she jumped into his arms with a big smile on her face. A second later she felt a huge pang through her stomach._

 _She slowly backed away and looked down at her shirt to see a knife had penetrated her middle. Her black and white shirt was bright red, stained with her blood._

 _She started hyperventilating when she realized it was Kai in front of her and not Damon._

 _"Gotcha!" Kai smiled. He pulled out the knife harshly and began wiping off the blade with his fingers. "So messy" he shook his head._

 _Bonnie held onto her stomach as she tried to make a run for it. Of course Kai caught up to her and held her from behind. Putting the knife to her throat he said "On the count of three we're going to say slice, ok? One, two, thre-"_

"Bonnie!"

Her eyes sprang open and she jumped up to hold onto her throat to make sure she wasn't bleeding. She didn't even notice Damon standing right over her with a worried expression on his face.

"Bon, are you okay? You were whimpering in your sleep."

Embarrassed, she looked down and stated she was fine and that it was just a stupid dream.

He sat down on her bed and continued to stare until she looked up at him with wet eyes.

"You're not fine," he observed. "What were you dreaming about?"

Bonnie quickly got up and went to get a bottle of water to cool her down. She had beads of sweat on her forehead from her nightmare.

"It was just a crazy, weird dream. I don't even remember it all the way." She stated unconvincingly.

Damon wasn't buying it. "Bonnie, cut the bullshit. What were you dreaming about?"

He took a couple steps forward until he was invading her space. Her heart sped up just a little but he figured it was because of the dream.

Bonnie looked up into his eyes and decided to confess. "It was about Kai." She whispered.

Damon's eyes softened and he continued to probe her with more questions. "What about Kai? What happened in the dream?"

"He stabbed me in the stomach and then he chased me until he got ahold of my neck and…" she couldn't finish it. She decided to leave out the part where she thought it was Damon at first.

"Hey, it was just a dream." He tried to soothe her. "Kai isn't like that anymore, he won't hurt you."

Bonnie's face was of disgust. "What do you mean he's not like that anymore? Do you know all of what he did to me? He's psychotic."

Bonnie breezed past Damon and stood on the other side of the room. "I know he hurt you but I'm telling you he's changed. At least he says he has, and so far he hasn't given us reasons to doubt otherwise."

"Are you serious right now? Just because he says he's changed doesn't mean he actually has. God, could you be anymore naïve?"

Damon's nose flared. "Look I'm not here to argue with you, I just wanted to check on you. You've been avoiding me, why?"

Bonnie's glare turned into a softer expression. "I haven't been avoiding you…I've just been busy."

Damon looked at Bonnie as if to say really, Bonnie? "C'mon Bon, I'm not stupid. I know when someone's trying to avoid me. I also know that you've barely spoken to Elena, or anyone else for that matter. What's really going on?"

Bonnie sighed. "I just want to be alone, ok? I haven't been feeling like myself lately. It's weird being back here. I thought that once I was back everything would fall into place and I would just go back to my life but everything's different now."

"How so?"

Bonnie thought to herself _shit, why did I say that? For starters I'm in love with you but you're with my best friend. And secondly, I keep having nightmares about Kai killing me which is_ making _my PTSD/depression worsen._

 _Other than that everything's fine though._

"I don't know, it just is. I feel like I missed so much, yanno? You forget that when people die everybody else has to move on with their lives. I mean I missed one of my best friend's moms funeral. How depressing is that?" Bonnie sat down on the floor next to her bed. Damon joined her.

It was quiet for a minute until Bonnie spoke up again. "When you came back did you just slide right back into your old life?"

"You mean the one where my brother was an auto mechanic and my girlfriend forgot she loved me? Yup!"

Bonnie slightly laughed. "I guess it just takes time…"

Pause.

"Bonnie there's something I need to talk to you about and I don't know how-"

All of a sudden there was a knock on the door and Elena stepped in.

"Hey, what are you doing here?"

Damon and Bonnie both got up from the floor. "Just checking on judgy here. She wasn't really communicating with me through text so I decided to show up." Damon grinned at Bonnie.

Elena walked over to Bonnie and gave her a hug. "I haven't been seeing you lately, are you ok?"

"I'm fine, you guys don't have to worry about me."

"Ok…hey do you want to go get a smoothie with me? We should catch up on some stuff."

Bonnie looked over at Damon. "Um..."

"You two go have fun, I'm gonna go."

Before Damon could leave Bonnie stopped him. "What was it that you wanted to talk about?"

"Nothing important, it can wait. See ya." As soon as Damon was out the door he was gritting his teeth. _I should of said something sooner, before Elena came. Now it'll have to wait. Again._

* * *

 ** _(_ Bonnie's POV)**

After I hung out with Elena I had went for a walk by myself to clear my head. It was nice considering everything that's been going on.

Elena was telling me about Caroline and how it was so hard for her to lose her mother that she ended up turning her humanity off. I actually don't blame her now that I've gone through hell.

If I had the option I would probably do the same as well. I semi told Elena about the dreams I had been having and how it was hard for me to get a good night's sleep so I asked her if she could get a prescription of sleeping pills for me or at least something that would help me knock out.

Since Elena was working in the medical department I figured she would have easy access to any type of medication. She told me she would look into it.

Now I was back at my dorm, in my room daydreaming. I was thinking about the conversation I had with Damon earlier and how he looked so worried when I first woke up.

 _Damon is worried about me, how cute. He even came to check up on me. Although it was strictly in a platonic way from his end, it was still nice to know he cared._

I also wondered what exactly it was that he wanted to talk to me about. He claimed it wasn't important but I had a feeling the only reason he stopped talking was because Elena came into the room.

Whatever it was, I figured he'll tell me when he's ready.

There was also something important I needed to tell him as well. Back in 1994 Damon had found the cure for vampirism and pledged he would bring it back for Elena. Of course things didn't turn out that way because I had sent him back at the last minute without it. But now I had it.

It was in my possession and I was questioning whether or not I should straight up give it to Elena or just give it to Damon. I thought about it for a while until I made my decision.

* * *

The next night I drove to the Salvatore's house and walked in when no one answered the door. I called out for Damon but no one had answered back.

I looked around the mansion until I came to the kitchen and stopped in my tracks. Elena and Damon were making out heavily, most likely about to have sex.

Elena was on the counter while Damon was all in between her long legs, stroking her face and kissing her neck sweetly. I couldn't help but stare.

Part of me was fascinated by how much they lusted for each other and the other part of me was green with jealousy.

 _That should be me he's kissing. Like in my dreams but only better. What am I talking about? He's with Elena! Stop thinking that way Bonnie._

I snapped out of my thoughts when I heard Damon speak.

"Hi, Bon Bon…" _Shit, I'm caught. But damn the way he said my name…_

"Sorry," I said dryly. "Awkward timing." I looked away for a second.

Damon was looking at me as Elena hopped off the counter and came up with an excuse to leave us. She walked passed me modestly and I couldn't help but smirk.

"This better be good." Damon smirked.

"I wanted to give you something. Sort of a gift, I guess you could say."

Damon looked confused. "What kind of a gift? A g string?"

I couldn't help but laugh. "Uh, No. definitely not that." Damon looked amused.

I opened up my bag and pulled out a small ancient looking container.

Damon's face went rigid. "Is that what I think it is?"

"Yes, it's the cure."

"Why are you giving this to me?" I was confused. I thought he'd be happy.

"Because I know how much you wanted it for Elena. And surprisingly my mom is ok with being vampire. Plus we know Stefan and Caroline will be alright eventually."

"Here." I handed it to him. He acted like he didn't want to take it.

He slowly opened it. "Wow. This is really it."

I gave him a small grin. "What if...what if I don't want it for Elena anymore? I don't want her to be human."

My eyebrows shot up at his revelation. "That's none of my business. This is between you and Elena. You can give it to her or not. It's your choice."

I put my hand over his hand and gave him a gentle squeeze.

* * *

When I got back to my room that night I knew trouble was coming. If Damon truly didn't want Elena to be human for his own selfish reasons, it would come back and bite him in the ass. Especially if Elena ever finds out he has it and he hasn't shared the news with her.

I definitely didn't want to be in the middle of that drama. I was glad it was off my shoulders and that someone else had it now.

The next morning I was up and ready for class when I heard a small knock on my door. I figured it was Damon so I had started speaking before the door was even open.

"You don't have to keep checking up on-"

 _Holy fuck._

"Hello Bonnie."

 _Kai._

* * *

 **A/N: Uh oh. Kai's going to confront Bonnie. How do you think she'll react? As always, leave reviews!**

 **P.S. I really appreciate all of you who are reading, following my story, and commenting.**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Here. We. Go. *Joker voice***

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

My throat was thick with saliva as I attempted to swallow down my fear and detest of the person standing in front of me. _Kai._

" _Hello Bonnie,"_ He had said. Greeting me as if we were old buddies.

"I _really_ need to talk to you, may I come in?" He was still standing outside of my dorm room and I was almost frozen except for the slight tremble that was taking over my body.

"You have five seconds to get away from me before I blow your brains out." My voice was low and steady. I even scared myself a little.

Kai looked a little fearful and hurt. "Please, Bonnie, I just want to talk. I'm not here to hurt you. I know you don't trust me but just please, let me inside."

"Five, four…"

"Bonnie, I'm begging you, please! Just give me two minutes." He wasn't going to stop begging until I let him talk. I don't know exactly what it was but I didn't feel like I was in any immediate danger. Maybe it was the way his eyes were boring into mine, letting me know how serious he was.

"You have two minutes." I know, I'm stupid. I can't believe I'm giving _him_ a chance.

After he stepped inside he continued to stare for a few seconds which made me shiver. And not in a good way.

"Start talking!" The way he was looking at me was creeping me out.

He cleared his throat. "Sorry, you just make me nervous." _Ha, yeah right. I think it's the other way around._

"First off I just wanna say I'm glad you're here and alive and that you made it out of 1994-"

"Which you left me there to rot all by myself." _The nerve of this guy._

He continued on as if I didn't interrupt him. "And I'm so sorry about everything I did. Bonnie, you're a good person and I like you. I just hope that you can forgive me and maybe we could be friends one day…"

 _Is he serious?_ "Are you serious right now?" His face showed me he was.

"Why would I ever want to be friends with someone like you? You _stabbed_ me. You _chased_ me down. You left me for _dead_ and now you want to be friends?" My voice was full of revulsion.

"Fuck. You." He didn't know what to say. What could he say?

"And stay the _hell_ away from me."

Kai studied my face for a few seconds and preceded to leave. I slammed the door when he left, I was fuming. _How dare he show up to my room and ask for forgiveness like some lost, hurt puppy. The audacity to ask if we could be friends after everything he did to me. He thinks an apology is going to fix that? Those memories will be with me forever. Haunting me throughout the day and especially at night. Always in my dreams._

I wiped underneath my eyes to stop any tears from coming down. _I'm not going to cry because of him. He will not ruin my day._

I grabbed my book bag and headed to class as if nothing happened. Of course I couldn't concentrate in class and kept replaying the conversation over and over in my head. _I should have kicked his ass when I had the chance._

Later on in the afternoon I came back to my room to relax and start on my homework. I still had Kai in the back of my mind but I tried to do things as I would do any other normal day.

I had just gotten out of the shower and changed into my comfy clothes. I sat on my bed and began to read when all of a sudden there was a knock at the door.

I froze.

Immediately I wondered if Kai was back.

I slowly got up from my bed and walked over to the door. I leaned in to see if I could hear anything from the other side, indicating who it might be but that didn't work. Another knock was made and I jumped back a little. _Don't be afraid._

I grabbed the door knob and quickly opened the door, ready to face off again.

"What took you so long?" Thank God. It was Damon.

"I, um, was trying to, um, concentrate." I could barely get my words out.

"Well you're not too busy for me, are ya?"

"No, no, come in." He walked in and was about to start talking until he really noticed my facial expression.

I was staring at the door as if Kai was going to round the corner.

"Bon," he snapped his fingers at me. "Are you there?"

"Sorry."

"Are you okay? You look a little spooked." _Should I tell him?_

"I'm fine, I'm just tired. So what's up?" _Guess not._

"Okay, before I start talking I wanna say-"

"But you're already talking." I cut him off.

"Ha _ha,_ very funny. You know what I mean, witch." I bit my lip to keep from smiling.

"I know that when I say what I'm going to say, you're going to get all judgy on me and right now I might actually need to hear that because sometimes I need some sense talked into me."

"Is this about the cure? Because Elena hasn't mentioned it to me yet."

"That's because I haven't given it to her. At least not yet."

" _Damon…"_

"I know, I know. You're gonna say I'm being selfish and that I should be happy to be able to give the one thing to the person that I love, what will ultimately make her happy but I can't, ok?"

"I actually wasn't going to say that but you are being selfish. What's really stopping you from giving it to her?"

"I know once I give her that cure things will change, Bon. I don't want that. I like the way things are now."

"So you're afraid that if you give her the cure and she becomes human again, she won't love you?"

"Something like that." He frowned.

"Well that's your problem, you're assuming what's going to happen before you even do anything. What if things don't change and she still loves you and wants to be with you?"

"But what if she doesn't? What if she remembers all the awful things I've done and dumps me? There's no way this is going to end well."

"You're being paranoid."

"No, I'm being a realist, there's a difference. Something always goes wrong when I'm involved."

"What do you want me to do? Pat you on the back and tell you that everything's gonna be okay? I can't do that because I don't know if everything's gonna be okay, but I do know that you could be making a big mistake." He was staring at me.

"She deserves to know, Damon. This is her life we're talking about and she should be able to choose what she wants to do with it."

He let out a long sigh. "You're right. I need to tell her. I have to tell her. Just not now. I need some time."

"You've had time."

"I need more then. Just let me have that, ok?"

"Okay."

We stood in a comfortable silence before Damon spoke up.

"I know you're probably waiting to kick me out so I'll leave. Let you get back to whatever you were doing."

I half smiled and walked him to the door. I was leaning on the door frame watching him about to walk away.

"Hey," he stopped and turned around to face me.

"I know I say that you guys don't need to worry about me or check up on me but I do appreciate it, so thanks."

"Hey, what are friends for?" I grinned when he tapped my nose playfully.

I looked into his eyes for a few seconds, letting my heart beat speed up.

"Bye, Bon."

"Bye."

I closed the door and leaned against it wondering how I got myself into this situation. _Why do I love you, Damon Salvatore?_

* * *

 **(Damon's POV)**

For the first time I could see it. I could tell that Bonnie loved me by the way she looked at me.

I mean of course she cares about me, we're friends, but this was more.

So much more.

I recognized the glow on her face when I smiled at her or when I jokingly tapped her nose. When she stared into my eyes I could hear her heart rate slightly pick up. It was… _amazing_.

In that moment I almost felt guilty for not reciprocating her feelings back. For not loving her the way she loves me.

I know what that feels like, better than anyone. Loving someone and wishing they looked at you the same way. Wishing they loved you just as much.

Maybe if I wasn't with Elena I would be with Bonnie. She _does_ get me pretty well. And she has my back. She's reliable, loyal, beautiful, kind, and intelligent. Fierce, strong, stubborn, annoying, judgy, self-righteous.

Way too good for me.

I know she could do so much better than me. She deserves someone good.

 _Who would have thought miss judgy would have the hots for me? I sure didn't._

 _I wonder if she dreams about me. I wonder if she touches herself with me in mind. Calling out my name in the shower as she cums._

Whoa, that got dirty fast. I might need a cold shower myself to cool off…

* * *

Coming from a jog, I walked into my room to find Elena standing there.

"Elena, what are you doing here?"

"Um," she pointed towards my closet and out came Caroline.

"So anyways I was thinking we could all go out and-" She stopped to look at me.

"Oh, hey! Look who showed up." My eyebrows shot up.

"Hi, Caroline…"

"I heard you were back from 1994 so I thought we should celebrate and all go out together. That is, as long as you two don't embarrass me." She definitely didn't have her humanity back.

Elena looked at me and then back at Caroline. "I don't think Bonnie's up for partying. Do you want to go?"

"Uh, I don't know, I have work to do and I'm kinda tired."

"Fine then, be a boring hermit. You'd think being back you'd want to go out and be around other people besides Damon but I guess not." _Shut up, Caroline._

"So tell me," _here we go._ "Did you and Damon…" She made a suggestive motion with her hands.

"Caroline!" Elena exclaimed.

"What? It's not unlikely they would sleep together. I mean they were stuck together for what, four months? And all that passionate arguing they do had to build the sexual tension."

Elena was looking at me but I couldn't look at her. Not that I was guilty of anything, besides having sex dreams about her boyfriend. But that doesn't count because it's not real.

Caroline put her hand to her ear. "Your quiet, Bon. You have nothing to say?" She was smirking.

"There's nothing to say. Nothing happened. Damon and I are just friends."

"Uh-huh, whatever you say." Caroline crossed her arms.

"Caroline, leave it alone." Elena looked irritated. Maybe even a little jealous.

Caroline put her hands up. "Fine, I'm leaving. Oh, and by the way, I borrowed your red halter top. It looks better on me anyway." _Geez, thanks._

Elena pinched the bridge of her nose and shook her head.

Caroline sashayed out the door. "Ciao, ladies!"

"Wow…she's something." Elena commented.

"It's weird, it's like even without her humanity she's still… Caroline."

"A little bitchier though."

"Yeah." I agreed. Elena and I couldn't help but laugh.

Before Elena left she let me know that she was able to get a prescription for me. It's for anxiety and supposedly would help me sleep better. It was similar to what Elena had took after her parents died in the car accident. She gave me a hug and promised to be back later with the pills.

I had been taking the pills for about a week now. They weren't necessarily helping me sleep better but they were making me sleep pretty hard.

Deep sleeps with graphic dreams.

* * *

 _Somehow I ended up at the Salvatore house late at night. I was in nothing but a tank top and shorts, with some sneakers I had threw on._

 _I quietly knocked on the door and the next moment Damon was opening it, staring down at me._

" _What are you doing here this late? Did something happen?" He looked a little worried._

" _No, I just, uh," Why was I here? "I don't know actually, I guess I just wanted to see you."_

" _At 12:30 am?" One of his eyebrows rose but he seemed to be amused._

" _Ha, I guess so."_

" _Come on." He opened the door wider for me to come in._

" _Did I wake you?"_

" _No. actually I was just thinking about you before you came."_

" _Really? What exactly were you thinking about?"_

" _Just wondering how you were doing. I hadn't checked up on you lately."_

" _It's only been a few days."_

" _I know, I just worry about you sometimes."_

 _I sat on the couch with the fire lit in front of me. He went over to his mini bar and poured himself a glass of liquor. I realized he had his shirt all the way unbuttoned and his pajama pants hung low on his hips in a sexy way._

" _You want one?" he held up a glass._

" _No, I'm good."_

 _He sat down right next to me, our thighs touching. He put one of his arms around me, on the back of the couch._

 _I watched him as he stared forward into the fire. He took a few sips of his bourbon and then let out an "hmm" sound._

 _It was real quiet except for the sound of the crackling fire._

 _I was enjoying the comfort of being next to him and the warmth from us touching._

 _He set his glass down and turned to me, grabbed my face and kissed me._

 _I stopped him. "What are you doing!?" I was frantic._

" _This is what you came here for, right?" I was breathing heavily but we had only kissed for a second._

" _No, I, why would I- you're with Elena, I-" I was stuttering. How embarrassing._

 _He grabbed my face to shut me up. "Bonnie," those blue eyes were so deep into mine, it was mesmerizing._

" _You and I both know that you want me." I didn't deny it._

" _You know how I know? Because I want you too." I let out a shaky breath._

" _I can tell by the way you check me out. Your heart beat speeds up when I look at you. I can smell your arousal right now." Shit._

" _What if somebody sees us?"_

" _No one's here, it's just you and me." I can't believe this is happening._

 _He slowly leaned back down to claim my lips and this time I didn't stop him. It felt heavenly to be able to kiss him so freely._

 _Our slow, tender kisses quickly turned into hot, open mouthed ones._

 _He abruptly picked me up and hung me over his shoulder. Taking us up the stairs, he slapped me hard on the butt._

 _I let out a yelp but was smiling super hard._

 _He dropped me on his bed and grinned down at me as he slowly climbed on top of me. Almost as if he was an animal._

 _I bit my lip when he started pulling down my shorts, excruciatingly slow._

 _He took one of my legs and began trailing kisses from the bottom to the top._

 _When he kissed the inside of my thigh I let out an unexpected whimper._

" _You like that?" he looked up at me._

 _I couldn't speak so I just nodded my head._

 _His long fingers slid my panties to the side and he began touching my pleasure spot._

" _Oh my…god" I couldn't sit up anymore so I laid my head back._

" _I knew you'd be wet for me."_

" _Damon…" His fingers were working me like magic. "That feels so good."_

" _You gonna cum for me?"_

" _Oh god, yes!"_

 _My whole body was shaking with ecstasy. I reached for him and gave him a passionate kiss._

" _Well, well, well, look who finally hooked up."_

 _Startled, I looked at the open door and seen Kai leaning on the frame._

 _I quickly pulled up my shorts._

" _What the hell are you doing here?" Damon was not happy._

 _Kai came into the room with a grin. "I came here to enjoy the show."_

 _In a flash, Damon had Kai up against the wall, ready to rip his throat out._

 _Kai placed his hand over Damon's heart and began chanting in Latin._

 _Damon's face was scrunched up in pain until his heart was ripped out._

" _Damon!" I screamed as his body slumped to the ground._

 _Kai turned to me with a smile. "Oops."_

" _You bastard!" I tried to concentrate as hard as I could on Kai. "Incendia"_

 _But nothing happened. Kai only laughed._

 _He stalked over towards me. "You can't use magic on me, Bon. This is a dream, remember?"_

 _He had me by the throat then. "You know I'm a little jealous. I thought you and I had something going on but apparently I was wrong."_

" _Why do good girls always fall for the bad guys? Hm?"_

 _He pushed me back so hard into the dresser, I felt my head crack. The impact woke me up._

I shot out of bed so quickly my head was spinning.

I started crying and hyperventilating. I couldn't catch my breath.

"Stay out of my head!" I yelled at no one.

I got up, searching for my anxiety pills. I opened the cap and poured way too many into my hand.

I went to the bathroom sink to wash them down. I was shaking so bad.

"This isn't working, why don't these work?" I was mumbling. "I don't understand why this isn't working."

Foolishly I took some more, as if that was going to make my misery stop. As if it would erase all the bad memories I have of Kai, 1994, and everything that ever went wrong in my life.

My eyes were blurry from my tears. I started feeling weak so I attempted to walk back to my bed but I didn't make it.

Darkness overtook me as I passed out.

* * *

 **A/N: Hey guys, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Sorry for the wait.**

 **Just to be clear Damon doesn't have romantic feelings for Bonnie _yet._ That'll come as time goes on.**

 **Don't worry about this turning into a BonKai story, Bonnie will not develop feelings for Kai.**

 **But I do want Kai to sort of have a crush on Bonnie, it's more of a creepy obsession than anything.**

 **I'm thinking next chapter Damon and Bonnie will have the talk about her feelings towards him.**

 **Don't forget to leave a comment!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Surprise! This was a shorter chapter so I was able to upload quicker. Aren't you happy?**

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

 _Beeeeep. Beep. Beep. Beep….._

The irritating noise awakened me from my peaceful sleep. My eyes fluttered open slowly and as my vision became clear, I realized I was not in my room.

My eyes roamed around the room, checking out the white, bare walls and I recognized the hospital smell.

 _Why the hell am I here? What happened?_

Just then the door opened and for some reason I was a little surprised to see Damon come in.

"Hey, you're up." He had a soft, sincere look on his face. He came over and sat down in the chair next to my bed.

"How are you feeling?" The fact that he was so worried about my well being made my heart warm.

"Ok, I guess, I'm just groggy." My throat was dry and my voice was coated with sleepiness.

"How did I get here? What happened?"

"You overdosed on some pills. Apparently you've been taking medication for anxiety."

All of a sudden the events of last night came back to me. I remember having a nightmare and waking up crying. I got up to take some more pills to help me sleep and-

 _Oh my god, I'm so stupid. I over dosed on medication that was supposed to help me sleep. How could I be so careless?_

That look of sympathy Damon was giving me did not make me feel good. I don't want him to pity me.

"What's going on with you, Bon? You can talk to me." I stared down at my fingers.

"I know I'm not the best person to talk to but I want to know that you're ok. I need to know."

My eyes started to tear up. I guess now is the time to fess up.

"I'm not ok." I admitted in a whisper.

"What's wrong?"

It took me a few seconds to speak. "Everything." I sobbed.

"Ever since I came back I haven't been able to sleep. Last night was the best sleep I've gotten in a month."

"I keep having these scary, vivid dreams about Kai coming to get me or kill me. It's like I can't get him out of my head." I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"Sometimes I feel like things would be better off if I had just stayed dead. Maybe I don't belong here anymore." My true feelings were coming out and I couldn't stop my tongue from telling the truth.

"You know when you and I were stuck in 1994, I thought it might actually be my hell hole," I laughed bitterly. "But when you were gone and Kai was able to torture me every second he got, then he left me all alone, that's when my life truly felt like hell."

"I was so lonely." All the pain I had hidden away, all the sadness, the truth of my condition was making me sob. I could feel my tears dripping down my chin but I didn't stop to wipe them. My nose was running and I'm sure my eyes were beginning to puff up.

"When you found me with that gun in my hand, I was really going to do it. I was going to kill myself because I couldn't take it anymore. You don't know what it was like."

Without a word, Damon held onto my hand and began to wipe my tears away. He leaned over a planted a soft kiss on my forehead. He stayed like that for what felt like a minute.

"Bonnie, look at me." He gently stroked my face and his thumb caressed my cheek.

I finally looked at him and his eyes were dead set on mine. "You're wrong." _I don't know what he means. What am I wrong about?_

"You belong here. Your life matters." His face was so serious like he was determined to make me believe what he was saying.

"You deserve happiness, dammit. And I'll be damned if you don't ever receive it."

A small smile played on my lips as I let his words sink in. _He really cares about me. My life matters to him._

"And Bon, I'm sorry I didn't get you out of there sooner. I wish it would have been me who stayed behind so you could have gotten out."

"No, don't say that." I spoke up. "It should have been both of us but it didn't happen that way."

"What matters now is that I'm here and you're here. And I'm gonna get through this."

For the first time in a long time I felt hope. Somehow, someway I would get through this. I truly believed that.

He squeezed my hand and smiled.

"I love you, Bon, you know that, right?" _I knew he cared but to hear him express it….wow._

I simply nodded.

"And I know that you love me….beyond our friendship." He took a deep breath.

"Bonnie, I know that you're in love with me."

 _Oh, boy._

 _He knows._

* * *

Caroline had snuck into Bonnie's room in the wee hours of the morning. She had been out partying all night and didn't feel like being alone so she decided she would crash at Bonnie's.

When she walked into the room she noticed Bonnie wasn't in her bed but the covers were pulled back, indicating she had gotten out of bed and was most likely in the bathroom.

"Bonnie?" Caroline mildly whispered.

No answer.

She walked further into the room and went towards the bathroom when she noticed Bonnie passed out on the floor.

Caroline being Caroline assumed Bonnie was passed out drunk. When she couldn't wake her up she decided to call Elena.

"Why are you calling me at this time of night?" Elena answered sharply.

"I just thought you'd like to know Bonnie is passed out drunk on the floor and for some reason she's not waking up."

"Wait, she's not waking up? Are you sure she's drunk?"

"No, but why else would she be- oh wait," Caroline noticed a prescription on the bathroom counter. "There's pills on here for… anxiety? Since when does Bonnie have anxiety?"

"Oh my god, I'll be right over." Elena hung up quickly.

Within seconds Elena was in the room crouching down, making sure Bonnie still had a pulse.

"Call 911, I think she overdosed."

"Ugh, fine" Caroline sighed.

Elena tried to give Bonnie some of her blood but she wasn't taking it.

When the ambulance arrived Elena rode with Bonnie while Caroline stayed back at the dorms.

Elena called Damon to inform him what was going on.

"Damon, Bonnie's being taken to the hospital, I think she overdosed on pills."

"What? Is she gonna be okay?"

"I hope so. They're gonna have to pump her stomach."

"I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Ok, love you."

Once the procedure was done, the doctor came out to let Damon and Elena know Bonnie was going to be ok.

"Can we see her?" Elena asked.

"She needs rest so it'd be best to wait until the morning. You're welcome to stay if you'd like."

Elena and Damon decided they would stay and watch over her just in case anything went wrong.

When morning time came, they both went into her room to see her but she was still sleeping. Elena wanted to go back to the dorm to shower and change and bring Bonnie some clothes so Damon volunteered to stay.

Damon had left Bonnie's room to get something to drink, specifically some O positive, and came back to find her awake.

* * *

 **(Damon's POV)**

"Bonnie, I know that you're in love with me." Her eyes widened a little and she gasped, no doubt surprised by my words.

"Damon, I…" I stared at her until she found the right words. "I would never...I mean I know that you're with Elena and I would never do anything to try to come in-between you two."

"I know that. You're not like me." I shaded myself. Nice.

"How did you know? Am I that obvious?" She bit her bottom lip nervously and I couldn't help but check out her full, plump lips.

"Well, sort of. I mean just one look into your judgy little eyes and I knew you fell for the better looking Salvatore." I cracked a joke to lighten the mood.

She scoffed but laughed at the same time. Shaking her head, she grinned at me.

"Actually…I found out by your tape."

"Tape? What ta-" She looked horrified once she realized what I was talking about.

"Oh my god, you seen that?" She covered her face with both her hands out of embarrassment. It was kind of cute. "Ugh." She groaned.

"Wait, how did you watch it? I left it back in 1994." Her eyebrows scrunched in confusion.

"I was there, Bon. When you were sitting there recording your suicide tape, I was sitting right by you." Her eyes became glossy again.

"When I heard you say what you said about me I actually wanted to hug you but I couldn't touch you or talk to you. All I could do was sit back and listen. I also wanted to kill you myself for wanting to end your life and for thinking I wouldn't come back for you." I gave her a look.

"I'm sorry, I just didn't have any kind of hope left in me."

"Don't be sorry. If I were you I wouldn't have faith in me either. I can be fickle sometimes."

She put her hand on top of mine. "I do have faith in you it's just I didn't have faith in myself."

"Well I'm glad I got to you in time before you did the dumbest thing you could've ever done."

She rolled her eyes but smiled.

We stayed in a comfortable silence for a little while, just enjoying each other's company.

"I hope this doesn't make things weird between us, I mean I want us to be friends."

"I have to admit, your feelings for me are a little strange, especially coming from you, but it's understandable." I shrugged. "I mean look at me." I flashed her my best smile, teeth and all.

She smirked at me and the heart monitor began to beep a little faster indicating her heart rate was going faster.

On the outside she was playing it cool but I knew the affect I had on her. I was driving her crazy.

And I loved it.

She leaned forward, coming real close to my face. If anyone walked in right now they would probably think we were about to kiss.

"Damon, get out of here." She told me. She leaned back in the bed and stuck her tongue out at me.

I squinted my eyes at her. "Rude."

Just then Elena came in.

"Bonnie," she exhaled. "I'm so glad you're ok, how are you?"

"I'll be all right. I promise." She glanced at me.

"I brought you some clothes. Do you want something to eat or drink?" Elena asked.

"Thank you, and yes, I'm starving."

"Let's call the nurse in so we can get you some food."

"All right," I said standing up. "I'll let you two ladies talk. If you need me, call me." I looked at Bonnie.

"Bye, witchy." I winked at her.

She grinned at me as I strolled out the room.

* * *

 **(Caroline's POV)**

 _I knew it._

Bonnie Bennett has feelings for Damon Salvatore.

What a time to be alive.

I assumed Bonnie and Damon had slept together in the other dimension and I was wrong about that but I knew there was something more there between them.

The "just friends" thing isn't going to work on me. I see right through it.

Yes, Damon is with Elena and doesn't have any romantic feelings for Bonnie. But sooner or later, he will fall for her.

I mean, Elena is my friend and all and I love her, at least emotion filled me did, but I can't stand her and Damon together.

They make an awful couple. And to this day I never understood how she chose Damon over Stefan.

Damon's hot, I'll give him that. And he's good in bed but I mean, c'mon. Stefan is much better boyfriend material than Damon.

 _Since Elena decided to trade Salvatore's, maybe I could have the other one_.

Anyways, I'm secretly hoping Bonnie steals Damon away so Elena will know what it feels like to have the one you love not love you back.

I honestly wouldn't mind Damon and Bonnie hooking up.

I know Bonnie wouldn't be a pushover with Damon the way Elena is.

Plus, I could tease Bonnie about it whenever I wanted.

Actually, why should I wait until the inevitable happens? I should start now.

I smiled to myself thinking about what's to come.

I can't wait until Elena finds out.

 _This should be fun._

* * *

 **A/N: Finally! Bonnie admitted her feelings to Damon. Actually Damon called her out on it but whatever.**

 **Of course he thinks nothing will change between them but it definitely will.**

 **I decided to leave Kai out of this chapter. I think Bonnie deserves a break, don't you?**

 **Sooo Caroline over heard some of Damon and Bonnie's conversation and now she knows Bonnie has feelings for Damon.**

 **Do you think she'll spill the beans to Elena or not?**

 **By the way, the Delena dynamic will start to shift to Stelena soon.**

 **As always, leave comments and thank you for reading.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Long chapter ahead. A lot of the dialogue between Bamon in this chapter is from episode 6x16.**

* * *

 **(Kai's POV)**

I can't stop thinking about Bonnie.

 _Bonnie._

 _Bonnie._

 _ **Bonnie.**_

Ever since I showed up at her dorm room and she literally told me to fuck off, I haven't been able to get her off of my mind.

It's like I'm a prepubescent school girl who has a crush on the popular jock who would never give me the time of day.

Except, I wouldn't exactly say I have a crush on Bonnie.

I've never had a crush on anyone really.

Beyoncé doesn't count because everybody loves Beyoncé, right?

Whatever this is, these weird feelings I have for her, they won't go away.

It's gotten to the point where I go to her college just to see her whenever I can.

I saw her out jogging the other day and she looked so deep in thought, listening to her music.

Even in her sweaty state and workout clothes, she looked cute.

It's pretty pathetic if you think about it. The only way I can be around her is if she doesn't know I'm there.

What's even crazier is the fact that she allows Damon to come inside her room and hang out.

Last I checked, Damon Salvatore was not the type of person Bonnie would want to be friends with.

Yet, here they are. Closer than ever.

Ew.

If she can forgive Damon for all he's done then surely she can forgive me.

It'll just take time.

But in the meantime, I do know a way I could get Bonnie to talk to me.

Through her new best friend of course.

And if he decides not to help me, which I'm sure he will, I'll just threaten him.

Better yet, I'll tell him I know about the cure.

His precious Elena would love to hear from me that her boyfriend has the cure and he hasn't given it to her.

It's such a bummer I have to result to this kind of behavior but what can I say?

I love it.

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

Elena and I were hanging out in Elena's dorm room when we both received a text message from Caroline.

 _Club 7 tonight. You down?_

"What is Club 7?" I wondered out loud.

"I think it's some underground club. Caroline told me about it a couple weeks ago but I didn't really care to go."

"We haven't heard from her in two weeks and now all of a sudden she wants us to go party with her?" My face scrunched up.

Elena sighed. "You know Caroline, always wanting to have a good time. Especially since her humanity has been off."

"Do you want to go?" I asked Elena.

"I'll go if you go. I mean, if you're up for it." Elena looked at Bonnie as if she wanted to go. "Plus, we can keep an eye out on Caroline. You know, make sure she's not killing anyone."

"Sounds fun." I stated sarcastically.

Elena laughed. "It's fine if you don't want to go, I mean you've been through a lot these last couple of weeks."

 _Try the last six months_ , I thought to myself.

Ever since the "attempted suicide" as everyone secretly thought, I've been more low-key than ever.

Every day I would do the same thing. Go to my classes, do my work, occasionally talk to Damon or Elena, and that was pretty much it.

 _When did I become so antisocial?_

On top of my other problems, I was now aware that Damon knew of my feelings for him.

 _Great. Now I'm just another one of the millions of other girls who has fallen for him. Along with my two best friends._

 _He probably laughed about it after we talked._

 _I can see him now, with a smug, cocky grin on his face._

 _Ugh, so embarrassing._

 _Sometimes I hate myself. I really do._

 _But like Selena Gomez's song goes, the heart wants what it wants._

 _It sounds so cheesy but it's true._

 _And now I'm sitting here with the girlfriend of the guy I love, who just happens to be my best friend._

 _I am so fucked._

"So?" Elena snapped me out of my thoughts. "You down?" Elena wiggled her phone in the air with a cheeky grin.

I sighed. "Sure, why the hell not."

Elena smiled big. "Okaaay, now we're talking." She got up and started rummaging through clothes.

"Elena, what are you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing, I'm picking out an outfit for you."

I scoffed playfully. "I can pick out my own outfit, thank you very much."

"How about this, I pick out your outfit and you pick out mine."

"What? No! You'll probably pick out something crazy on purpose."

"I swear I won't." Elena promised as she laughed.

"Then why are you laughing?" I eyed her.

"Because your funny. And I'm excited."

"Why are you so excited?" I was actually curious.

"With everything that's been going on, it'll be fun to get out and just enjoy ourselves." Elena sighed happily.

"You need it, I need it, and we all need it. Just one night of fun."

"Okay." I simply answered.

I have to admit I wasn't really excited about going out but seeing Elena happy made me feel a little better about the situation.

I was still nervous as hell though.

A little later Caroline showed up with a neon colored crop top and a silver skirt.

Elena and I looked down at our outfits and wondered if we would look out of place considering Caroline's outfit.

Caroline checked us out for a moment before saying "You'll be fine."

Elena picked out a mini black dress for me and I paired it with my jean jacket and strappy black heels.

I chose a red strapless top and black skirt for Elena. Of course she paired it with a leather jacket and black booties.

It felt weird being dressed.

I hadn't gone out and partied since….I can't even remember.

I was just hoping we would all have a good time.

Before we left Caroline had some "rules" for us that included us having to take at least one shot and apparently if we got in her way of having fun she would feed on someone.

Maybe even kill them.

Elena and I promised to stay out of her way for the other club member's sake.

"So is Damon coming?" Caroline attempted to make conversation.

"No, I asked if he wanted to come but he said he'd pass and let us girls have a night out." Elena responded.

"I was actually asking Bonnie." Caroline grinned.

"Uh, why would I invite Damon?"

"I don't know, you two seem to be all buddy, buddy now so I thought you'd ask him to tag along."

Caroline was being weird and I didn't know what she was trying to hint at but whatever it was, she needed to stop.

"Nope. Just us tonight."

"Actually you're wrong. I invited Stefan."

"What!?" Elena and I both exclaimed.

"Why would you invite Stefan?" Elena spoke up for the both of us.

"Oh c'mon guys, he's our friend. You act like he's gonna go on a murder spree in the club." Caroline teased.

"Um, that's a possibility!" Stefan still had his humanity off thanks to Caroline so him being at a club full of people was not good.

"Care, you should uninvite him. Like now." Elena demanded.

Caroline sighed. "You two worry too much."

I looked at Elena as if to say 'what are we gonna do?'

She just shrugged and looked just as defeated as I felt.

There was nothing we could do at this point, it was too late.

Stefan was coming.

I was ready to go home and we hadn't even arrived yet.

 _Great._

* * *

The club was jam packed and super smoky.

EDM music was blaring through the speakers as everyone was dancing against each other.

It was dark but at the same time lit up from all of the glow sticks and blinking lights.

Looking around I could see why Caroline dressed the way she did.

Most people were wearing neon colored prints and white accessories that glowed in the dark.

At that moment I was grateful Elena picked out a black dress instead of something flashy.

I definitely didn't want to stand out tonight.

We made our way across the dance floor and to the bar where Caroline ordered us shots.

The three of us toasted to a fun, carefree night but I knew it was a lie. No way tonight would be fun.

Caroline was the first to leave and get on the dancefloor and then eventually Elena joined her and some guy who was grinding against Care.

I stayed back and just nodded to the music.

Out of the corner of my eye I seen a guy walking my way.

I tried to act like I didn't see him but he seen me look and smiled as he approached me.

"Hey, you wanna dance?" he asked.

"No, no, I'm ok, but thanks."

"Just one dance I promise. You're too pretty to be standing here by yourself." I inwardly rolled my eyes.

"Ok…" I gave in.

He pulled my hand and led me into the middle of the dance floor.

At first I wasn't really feeling it but after a minute or so I started really dancing and I was actually having fun.

That is, until the douche put his hands on my ass.

I immediately smacked his hands away. "What the hell!"

"Oh, c'mon, you know you like it."

I shook my head and started to walk away until he grabbed my wrist a little too tightly and yanked me back.

"Where do you think you're going?" He looked angry.

"Let me go!" He wouldn't so I did what I had to do.

All of a sudden his hand left my wrist and he began to franticly pat his shirt that I had set on fire.

"You crazy bitch!" he yelled.

I ran off before he could find me again.

 _God, this is such a disaster._

 _I knew this wasn't a good idea._

 _Maybe this is my fault for thinking so negatively._

 _Maybe I brought this on myself._

I couldn't find Caroline or Elena so I wondered off towards a section of the club that was a little quieter.

I just needed to get out of there and breathe.

My phone started vibrating so I pulled it out of my jacket pocket and seen Damon's name flash across the screen.

I smiled and picked up.

"This may sound weird but I'm actually glad you called."

"Uh oh, did Caroline go off the rails? If so, I called it." He said in a sing song voice.

I scoffed. "Gloating in one of my best friend's time of need, it's rare that I miss you."

"Bonnie, I thought I told you, our relationship only exists within the confines of 1994." He teased.

"Oh please, you think this makes us friends?" I joked right back.

I heard him laugh a little on the other end.

"You don't have to pretend, Bon. I'm like a fever you can't shake."

I blushed. "Yea, a disease."

"So are you girls livin' it up over there?"

I sighed. "Caroline and Elena are."

I think he could sense that something was wrong by the drop of humor in my tone.

"Are you okay?" he asked seriously.

"Well, if scorching some dick with my magic is ok, then yea, I'm peachy." My voice cracked at the end.

"I can come and get you if you're ready to go."

"No, it's ok. I promised I would try to have fun so I'll just endure the rest of the night."

Pause.

"So…why did you call me again?"

"Just a teensy favor. Apparently Kai has been trying to reach out to you and hasn't succeeded in doing so and you know how he's gone from a sociopathic caterpillar to a slightly less evil butterfly and-"

"Yea and anyone who believes that is an idiot and don't ever repeat that name to me again, ok?"

There was a slight pause before he answered.

"Yea, ok. No problem."

"So what was the favor?"

"Don't worry about it, I'll figure it out on my own. Happy raving."

Then he hung up.

That was a slightly weird, yet comforting phone call.

I put my phone away and went to look for Elena.

When I spotted her, I noticed she was looking towards the bar and I looked in her direction to see Stefan and Caroline drinking with each other and laughing.

Let's just say Elena didn't look too happy.

"Hey," I said when I came up to her. "What's going on?"

"Stefan has arrived and now him and Caroline are acting like a psychotic couple." She said a little bitterly.

My eyebrows shot up. "You're not jealous….are you?"

Elena quickly faced me, "No! Why would I be jealous?"

"I-I, was just asking."

"Where have you been?" Elena changed the subject.

"I was dancing for a little while but the guy I was dancing with turned out to be a jerk so."

"Ugh, this isn't turning out to be so fun, is it?"

"No, not at all."

Elena and I sighed at the same time.

Stefan approached us out of nowhere with a smirk on his face.

It was the first time Stefan reminded me of Damon.

"Elena, Bonnie." He greeted us with a drink in his hand.

"I'm gonna step outside for a few." I told Elena.

She nodded and I took off to avoid any more awkward conversation.

When I got to the area near the entrance I rested my head against the wall.

I was feeling tired all of a sudden and ready to go.

I closed my eyes for a moment and took a deep breathe.

I opened my eyes to see Damon coming towards me.

I immediately felt better.

"Hey," I smiled. "What are you doing here?"

He smiled back for a second but it didn't seem genuine.

"Don't freak out," he started. "but…."

He stepped aside and out came the person I hated the most.

Kai.

"Hi… Bonnie." He said.

I couldn't believe this.

Why would Damon bring Kai _here_?

"Um" Kai acted like he couldn't talk.

All I could do was stare at him with a blank face.

"Spit it out!" Damon urged Kai.

"Uh, I just wanted to apologize again for anything- _anything_ I did to hurt you….will you forgive me?"

I hadn't even realized how badly I was shaking until I couldn't stop myself.

I had heard everything he said but while he was talking, all I could think about was the immense pain he caused me.

I needed to get out of here.

 _Right Now._

"Bon, did you hear what I said?" Kai asked me after a minute of not saying anything.

"If I ever see your face again, I will _melt_ it off."

I gave Kai a deathly stare before I stormed out of the club.

* * *

 **(Elena's POV)**

Stefan was smirking at me, knowing that he was making me uncomfortable.

"Loosen up, Elena. I thought you came here to have a good time."

"I did and I was…"

He laughed. "Before I showed up? Well I'm not going anywhere so you might as well deal."

Elena gritted her teeth. "Stefan, why are you doing this?"

"Why am I over here having a boring conversation with you when I could be feeding on some hot chick right now? I don't know." Stefan was being an asshole. I hated seeing him like this.

"You know that's not what I meant and I'm being serious."

Stefan shrugged.

I continued talking.

"Look, I know Caroline forced you to turn it off but you don't have to stay like this. You have a choice to turn it back on and come back home."

Stefan looked amused. "And why would I do that, Elena?"

"Because this isn't how you really are and you'll have so much guilt if you continue doing what you're doing. We miss you…"

"Who's we? You mean you." Stefan stated in a cocky manner.

"I mean all of us." We stared at each other.

He started moving closer until he backed me into a corner.

"So what you're saying is," he said in a sensual tone. "You like me better with my emotions on, is that correct?"

He was so close I could feel his intoxicated breath on my face.

"Yes," I let out a shaky breath.

"I care about you Stefan and I hate seeing you like this. I just want you to be happy."

He stared at me for a few seconds before he started shaking his head, laughing.

"You're full of shit, Elena."

For some reason that made me upset.

His attitude was getting under my skin and I didn't appreciate him calling me a liar.

"I'm not!" I said defensively.

"Whatever." He rolled his eyes and preceded to walk away but I sped in front of him.

"Don't walk away from me." I said in the strongest voice I could do.

"Get out of my way, Elena." He sort of pushed me to the side, which only made me try harder.

I was back in his face again.

"Stefan!"

All of a sudden he had me pushed up against the wall with his hand around my throat.

"You just don't know when to quit, do you?"

Then his lips smashed into mine.

I didn't respond at first.

My first instinct was to push him off but I messed up.

I kissed him back.

Our hot, heated kiss only lasted for a few seconds before he pulled away.

"Damon not satisfying you?" he licked his lips.

I needed to get out of here.

I pushed him back.

"You're disgusting."

"And you're a liar."

He walked away and I swear I felt my heart beating.

* * *

I was so mad, I didn't know what to do.

Mad was an understatement.

I was _furious._

 _Enraged._

 _Outraged._

But on top of everything else, I was hurt.

The fact that Damon brought him and allowed him to be that close to me really hurt.

I thought he understood I didn't want anything to do with Kai.

I guess I thought wrong.

 _How could he do this to me?_

The scene of what just happened kept replaying over and over in my head.

Before I realized it, I was back at my dorm.

I had walked the whole way back but the fresh air didn't help me one bit.

When I entered my room the lights were flickering and everything was going haywire, no doubt the result of my rage and magic all combined in one.

I was only there for a few minutes before I heard the door open.

I turned around expecting Kai to have followed me but it was Damon.

I didn't want to see him either.

He came in slow and cautiously, knowing I was on edge.

"Hey, calm down, it's just me. He's not here." _As if that was supposed to make me feel better_.

"Bonnie-"

"Save it, I don't wanna hear it."

"Bon, please. The only reason I did this was so that you could face him and get over your fears."

I couldn't believe my ears.

Damon thought he was doing me a favor?

Either he's insane or lying.

I call bullshit.

"I specifically told you I didn't want to hear his name or be near him, yet you brought him to me anyway."

"Was I unclear?" I said through gritted teeth.

"Bon, he just wanted to talk."

"I don't care! Have you not been listening to me?"

"I get that he hurt you but-"

"Listen!"

I twisted my hands in the air as if I were actually stabbing Damon and blood started to trickle down his shirt.

He bent over in pain and held onto his bleeding wound.

"I want you to feel what I felt. You were there the first time he hurt me, remember? An arrow through the stomach."

I twisted my hand, igniting more pain towards Damon.

"But you weren't there for what happened next. When he chased me through the hospital, when he _strangled_ me, _"_

Now I was giving Damon the feeling of being choked so hard that you feel like you're going to pass out.

Because that's how Kai made me feel.

"You know what else he did? He tied me up and put me in a trunk. Then he had the nerve to come back and try to make amends only to stab me again!"

Damon was trying to tell me to stop but he could barely talk from all of the pain.

In this moment, I didn't care.

"The worst part of it all, after everything he did, he left me alone." Now I was sobbing.

"I wish I could show you what that feels like," I choked out. "But I can't."

When I couldn't hold it anymore, I let Damon out of his misery.

He was coughing and groaning all over the place.

"I want you to get out." I said calmly.

"Bonnie….I'm so sorry."

"GET OUT!"

He jumped back and went out my door quietly.

When I was finally alone I broke down.

I fell to the floor and cried out loud.

I tried to cover my mouth to lessen the noise but I couldn't hold it in.

I curled up in a ball and cried for the rest of the night.

* * *

 **A/N: Wow, a lot happened.**

 **First off, stupid Kai ruined everything!**

 **Now Bonnie is upset with Damon.**

 **Do you think he'll be able to make it up to her?**

 **Stefan and Elena kissed while Elena is still with Damon *gasp***

 **Do you think Elena still has feelings for Stefan or was it a one time thing only?**

 **What about Caroline? I'm thinking she might have seen the kiss between them.**

 **Do you think she'll be jealous?**

 **I'm having so much fun with this story! If you like it, please leave reviews!**

 **I love the interaction and knowing how you guys feel.**

 **Until next time.**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: I'm back with chapter 7! I always try to update within a week or two so if it takes me longer than that, I apologize in advance.**

 **Did any of you watch the season 7 premiere of TVD? DID YOU SEE THE BAMON INTERACTION? THE FEELS!**

 **I love them so much, it's a sickness.**

* * *

Caroline pulled out her cellphone and went to her contacts and pressed Bonnie's name.

It began to ring and soon after Bonnie picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hold on, I'm putting Elena on."

Caroline decided to do three way with her two selfish best friends so she could yell at both of them at the same time.

"Hey," Elena picked up.

"Bonnie, you still there?" Caroline asked.

"Yea."

"Ok good. Now, what the hell is wrong with you two!?"

"Caroline, what are you talking about?" Elena sighed.

"What am I talking about!? I'm talking about the fact that I invited you two out with me last night and the both of you bailed on me! We were supposed to be having a fun night out, remember?"

Bonnie wasn't in the mood to respond so Elena spoke up for the both of them.

"Care, we didn't mean to bail on you but you got to admit last night sucked."

Caroline scoffed. "Maybe for you two airheads but I had the best time. _I_ know how to have fun unlike some people."

"Look, if all you're gonna do is bitch and moan at us then I can hang up right now." Bonnie threatened.

"Oh wow, you finally spoke up. I was beginning to think you had already hung up." Caroline rolled her eyes.

"You guys, can we not do this right now? There's no point in arguing over something we can't change. Caroline, I'm sorry for bailing, okay?"

Caroline sighed, "Whatever, I'm never inviting you two out with me again."

"Fine by me." Bonnie stated lowly.

"Bonnie!" Elena unintentionally laughed.

"By the way Elena, what happened between you and Stefan? I saw you two huddled in a corner. Got something you want to share with us?" Caroline already knew what happened, she was just waiting to see if Elena would fess up.

"Nothing happened…he was being irrational."

"Uh huh, and that's it?"

"Why do you keep pushing this?" Bonnie wondered. "She said nothing happened."

"She's lying, Bonnie, that's why."

Elena groaned, "Fine, we kissed!"

"What!?" Bonnie exclaimed.

"I already knew. I seen it when it happened." Caroline bragged.

"How could you kiss Stefan, Elena?"

"I don't know, Bon! It just happened! I mean technically he kissed me but I admit I kissed him back for a few seconds." Elena confessed.

"Psh, like that makes a difference, you still kissed him while you're in a relationship with his brother."

"Don't you think I know that already, Caroline?" Elena gritted her teeth. "I feel terrible."

"You should, he doesn't belong to you anymore. You made the choice to let him go, or did you think you could have them both?" Caroline's tone suddenly became bitchy.

"Whoa, why are you ganging up on me? I already said I feel bad about it." Elena defended herself.

"Yea that was harsh, Care." Bonnie agreed.

"You know you were thinking the same thing, Bonnie. And it's the truth." Caroline didn't care if she hurt Elena's feelings.

Bonnie sighed deeply. "I'm gonna go you guys, I don't really feel up for talking anymore."

"Are you all right?" Elena asked.

"Yea, I'll be fine."

"Hold up, you never told us why you left in the first place." Caroline tried to change the subject.

"Like Elena said, the night sucked. And those guys were disgusting. See ya." Bonnie hung up and both girls knew there was something she wasn't telling them.

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

A week had passed since that awful night at the club.

Every day, for the past seven days, Damon would show up, apologize, and try to buy my forgiveness by buying me things.

It was annoying and somewhat sweet. But I would never admit that to him.

He needed to learn that he couldn't just do whatever he wanted and get away with it.

Especially not when it came to me. I didn't play that.

On the morning after the Kai situation, he had come out of nowhere and handed me a Carmel Frappuccino, which is my favorite and he knew that, and continued to bug me all the way to my class.

The next morning, he had flowers delivered to my room and attached a little note that said "forgive me" in his hand writing.

I rolled my eyes at the gesture but deep down I did appreciate that he was trying. Just not in the right way.

This little charade continued throughout the week and I was getting tired of seeing his face every morning, believe it or not.

Today was Saturday and I was grateful that I didn't have any classes so I could stay inside if I wanted to.

My phone had pinged but I ignored it as I went into the bathroom to shower and brush my teeth.

When I came out of the bathroom and looked at my phone, I seen Damon's name.

 _No surprise there. He's such a pest._

The first text was the same question he had been asking me all week: _am I forgiven?_

 _No, Damon. You're not._

The other texts he had sent me was to let me know he was coming over whether I liked it or not.

 _I don't have time for this! I mean, technically I do but I don't want to. I just want to relax today._

 _No Damon, no Elena, no Caroline._

My phone pinged again, he responded with a: _what do I need to do for you to forgive me?_

 _Is he serious?_

 _Why do you care so much?_ I texted back.

 _Do you really have to ask that question?_

A few minutes later there was a knock on my door.

"Who is it?" I called out.

"You know it's me." Damon said.

"What do you want?" I sighed.

"Let me in."

"No."

"Oh, c'mon, Bon, don't be like this." He begged. "Just open the door so we can talk."

"I don't wanna talk to you."

"You're talking to me right now. And this is the most I've heard you say to me in a week so that means we're making progress."

"No it doesn't. Now leave."

"Damn it, Bonnie, let me in!" He banged on my door loudly.

 _That's it._

I got up and stomped my way towards my door and swung it up in a dramatic fashion.

" _What_ do you want!?" I yelled.

He walked in with a small grin, "Thanks."

I looked at him like he had two heads. "Seriously? All of that just because you wanted to be let in? You're such a child, it's ridiculous." I fussed.

"I'm a child?" he turned around to look at me, "you're the one who's bent on being mad at me after I've apologized a million times and bought you coffee for a week straight _and_ I bought you flowers."

I scoffed. "You think you can just buy me coffee and flowers and everything will be okay? No, that's not how this works. I'm not Elena."

His expression turned serious. "I know you're not Elena. You're Bonnie and you're my best friend."

I didn't say anything to that so he continued.

He sighed and came closer to me.

"I don't want you to be mad at me anymore, I hate this. As much as I like bickering with you, I don't like you being this upset with me." He confessed.

I stared into his eyes and knew he genuinely meant what he said.

"I don't like being mad at you either, Damon." I sighed, "But what you did really hurt me."

"I know." He responded.

"No, I don't think you do. I told you how much Kai hurt me and you went behind my back just to-what exactly did you do this for? I know he must have said something to you." I questioned.

Damon bit his tongue for a second. "All right, fine, he told me that if I didn't help him talk to you then he would tell Elena about the cure."

I rolled my eyes. "Wow, it always goes back to Elena…" I shook my head.

"This isn't about Elena, this is about you and me. I want my best friend back. I'll do whatever you want me to do." He latched onto my shoulders and squeezed.

We stared at each other for a minute. Damon patiently waiting for my answer, for me to say "okay, Damon, you're forgiven." But I just couldn't do it. At least not yet.

I looked down and sighed. "I can't do this right now, can you please go?"

"Bonnie…"

" _Please_ , just go." He nodded sadly and walked slowly towards the door.

"I'll text you later."

"Don't expect me to text back."

The door closed and I flopped on top of my bed and groaned loudly.

It didn't feel good to have to be so harsh with him but he had brought this upon himself.

I couldn't let my feelings for him get in the way of my thinking. Just because I loved him, doesn't mean I would let him walk all over me.

I would forgive him eventually. But right now he would just have to keep begging _._

* * *

 **(Elena's POV)**

I couldn't believe this. Damon had the cure all this time and he didn't tell me.

I had to hear it from Kai of all people.

I had went to the boarding house looking for Damon when I noticed Kai sitting on the sofa.

He informed me Damon had the cure and of course I didn't believe him at first but then he had told me everything that happened at the club last weekend with Bonnie.

I was so confused as to why he wouldn't tell me but then I realized he probably didn't want me to be human because there was a possibility he would lose me.

As selfish as that was, I understood where he was coming from.

I myself had some things I needed to get off of my chest. Like the fact that I kissed Stefan and ever since I've been thinking about him.

Way more than I had been previous to the kiss. It was affecting me in ways I didn't understand.

Or maybe I just didn't want to understand.

Damon walked into the house and gave me a small smile when he spotted me.

"Hey," he walked in and immediately made his way towards the alcohol.

"We need to talk," I started. "And I need you to be honest with me."

He looked confused but agreed.

I took a deep breath. "Do you have the cure?"

His eyes slightly widened and I knew that he did. "How do you know?"

"That's not what I asked you."

"Yes, Elena, I do. Now who told you?"

"Does it matter?"

"Of course it matters. If it was Bonnie, I'll strangle her." _Wait, huh?_

"Bonnie? No, it was Kai." I was confused. "Bonnie knew?"

"Yea she's the one who gave it to me to give to you but…I just couldn't do it." He confessed.

"And I'm gonna kill Kai." He added on.

"Yea and he also told me what you did to Bonnie, how could you do that to her?"

"Not you too," he whined. "Look, I've already heard it enough from Bonnie, I know, it was wrong."

"Damon…I think the real question here is why didn't you tell me about the cure? Why didn't you give it to me?"

He took a long drag of bourbon and stared at me until words finally came out of his mouth.

"I don't like change." He simply said.

 _Okay, now I'm really confused._ "Damon, what the hell does that have to do with you not telling me about the cure?"

"Think about it Elena, I give you the cure, you take it and become human again and poof," he motioned his hands like magic, "you'll be back in Stefan's arms."

If I still had a beating heart, it would be beating rapidly. Just the mention of Stefan's name made me sweat.

"Damon…" I didn't know what to say but I did want to comfort him.

"Am I wrong?" he questioned me.

His icy blue eyes were so full of hidden emotion. Jealousy, pain, **hurt**.

"Yes, I mean…Stefan and I are….we-" _What are we, really?_

"Don't say you're just friends. I know Stefan still loves you, he always will. Even in his homicidal, psychopathic state he still does." He sneered.

"StefankissedmeandIkissedhimback." It came out in a rush.

Damon's nose flared as he looked at me. "So you cheated on me?"

"No! It wasn't like that, it happened so fast and I-he kissed me and I kissed him back for a second, I swear that was it."

 _How did this get turned around on me? Oh yeah, because I had to open up my big mouth and tell him about the kiss._

 _Regardless of the hurt, this needed to come out. I needed to tell him._

 _He deserved to know._

"Just admit it, Elena…you still love Stefan, don't you?" his eyes were starting to look glossy.

I started tearing up. "I don't know how I feel. I thought I was completely over him but after he kissed me I couldn't stop thinking about him." I was being brutally honest.

"Some things are better left unsaid, Elena." He said in disdain.

"I'm sorry," tears came down my eyes. "I thought we were past all of this but-"

He slammed his glass down and walked up to me. "I thought that too, Elena! I thought once and for all you had made up your mind, you had picked me and we would be together but-" He stopped and shook his head. "It's always gonna be Stefan, right?"

"Damon you know I love you," I whispered. "And you know how bad I want to be human." I cried.

"Why can't I just take the cure and still be with you?"

"We both know things will change once you become human again, Elena."

"…which is why I have to let you go." He strained his face.

"What? Damon-" He cut me off.

"Let's be honest, we were bound to breakup at some point. We could barely keep it together before you erased your memory."

I winced, remembering how much that had hurt him.

"I'm sorry." I choked out.

"I'm sorry too."

"I don't wanna lose you, Damon." I pressed.

"I'm already gone, Elena. I'm already gone."

And with that, he went out the door with a bottle of bourbon in his hand.

I let myself really cry after he left.

 _Oh my god, what have I done?_

* * *

Since it was the weekend, I decided to stay up a little late and watch a movie. In the middle of the movie I heard a tiny thump near my door.

I froze, trying to concentrate on the sound when I heard it again but a little louder than the first time.

I slowly got up and made my way towards the door, ready to defend myself in case there was danger lurking.

I peeked out of the door and was surprised to see Damon sitting down, thumping his head on the wall with a bottle of bourbon in his hand.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered, not wanting to disturb the other people in the hall.

"I didn't know where else to go." The sorrow in his voice was so disheartening.

"What happened?"

"I broke up with Elena."

 _I should have known it had something to do with Elena. It always does._

Reluctantly, I decided to let him in. I didn't want to kick him down any more than what he was.

He came into my room and sat on my bed, continuously drinking.

I stood there, waiting for him to say something, anything, but he was silent.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really," he finally answered. "But to make a long story short, Elena found out about the cure, confronted me, and she told me she kissed my brother. So I broke up with her."

Although I was still upset with him for what he did, I couldn't help but feel bad for him.

"You don't seem surprised." He observed.

"She told me and Caroline about the kiss. As for the cure…I'm not surprised she found out. I figured she would find out some kind of way." _But wait, how did she find out?_

"I didn't tell her if that's what you're thinking."

"I know you didn't, Kai did." Damon said.

 _I hate Kai. I really do._

"I'm sorry, Damon." I don't know what I was apologizing for. All I knew was my friend was hurting and he needed somebody.

"That's exactly what she said." Damon growled.

Eventually I sat down next to Damon and put my hand on his shoulder for comfort.

"Look," I started. "I know this hurts but just give it some time. Maybe time apart will be good for you two but I'm sure you'll work it out."

"Not this time, Bon. It's over. For good." He said with certainty.

"Well whatever happens, just don't be too hard on yourself. Yes, you were wrong for not telling her about the cure but she was also wrong for kissing Stefan. I know you think Elena is too good for you but that's not true. The truth is we're all flawed. We all screw up sometimes…even the ones we love." He looked at me then, knowing I wasn't talking about Elena anymore.

"You deserve love, Damon. Just like the rest of us do. And one day you'll find a great love. A love that doesn't make you feel like you have to compete with Stefan. She'll love you unconditionally and you'll love her just the same."

"She'll be strong, feisty, stubborn, and a perfect match for you. She'll be a best friend and a lover, all in one. She'll stand with you through everything."

He was staring at me intensely. My insides were fluttering and the air between us, as well as in the room, somehow became thicker.

"That sounds a lot like you." He pointed out.

My eyes darted down and to the side, now realizing I was subconsciously describing myself.

 _Crap._

"I, uh…" I didn't want him to think I was trying to come onto him since he just broke up with Elena but I was at a loss for words.

His fingers lifted my chin so my forest green eyes could zone in on his oceanic eyes.

The way he was looking at me was too much. I wanted to turn away but he wouldn't let me.

The hairs on the back on my neck stood as his face began to lean into mine.

My breathing was unsteady and I knew what he was about to do.

Our foreheads were touching and he lingered there for a moment as if he were waiting on me to make the next move. To go in for the kill.

Or in this case, the kiss.

All I could hear was my heart pounding against my chest and the sounds of our breaths.

I could smell the alcohol on his.

He was so close to kissing me and believe me, I really wanted to, but I knew it wasn't right. This isn't how I wanted our first kiss to be.

So I stopped him.

"We shouldn't," I found my voice. I put my hand on his shoulder to push him back a little.

When he sat up straight and looked at me, his expression was surprisingly angry.

"Why not?" he asked in a rugged voice.

"Because you just broke up with Elena."

"Oh, so now you're rejecting me too." He pouted.

"I'm not rejecting you, I just-"

"I thought you wanted me." He said, nonexpectantly.

"I do," my tone was softer. "But not like this. I don't wanna be your rebound."

He got up then, "It's fine, I get it." He tried to brush it off like it was nothing. I think I hurt his feelings.

"Damon…" I wanted to explain myself but he wouldn't listen.

"I said it's fine, Bonnie!" he said more forcefully.

He looked like he didn't know what to do next so he headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"For a walk." He was gone after one blink.

I sighed loudly.

 _Great, now he's mad at me. I'm the one that should be mad at him!_

I stayed up a little longer to see if he would come back but he didn't. So I did the only thing I could think to do. Go to sleep.

* * *

I woke up early the next morning. I checked the time to see that it was a little after seven.

I usually didn't wake up this early unless I was forced to. My body wouldn't let me go back to sleep so I got up.

I guess I was still worried about Damon.

Walking towards the bathroom, I almost tripped on something.

It was Damon. Sleeping on the floor.

 _I can't believe he slept on the floor._

I shook him awake and the sun coming in from my window hit his eyes, making them appear as glaciers. He was beautiful.

A beautiful mess.

He stood up and groaned as he stretched.

"Are you okay?" I couldn't help but be concerned.

"Does it look like I'm okay?" he snapped.

I didn't say anything because what good would it do?

"Sorry," he apologized. "I didn't mean to snap at you."

"It's ok."

"No, I meant for last night. I was a little…out of it." His eyes widened as he remembered the events of last night and what almost happened.

"I get it." I simply said.

We stood in silence for a few seconds before it got awkward.

"You should probably head back home if you don't want to see Elena in the hallways."

"Yeah." He agreed.

He scooped up his jacket and headed for the door. As he was closing the door, he stuck his head back in.

"Did you mean what you said last night?"

I knew what he was referring to.

"I meant every word."

* * *

 **A/N: Oh no, Delena broke up. I'm so sad (sarcasm)**

 **Caroline's still...Caroline.**

 **And Bamon almost kissed but Bonnie stopped it. Do you think she was right to stop it or should she have given in?**

 **As you can tell, I'm trying to slowly change the dynamics to Bamon and Stelena but it won't happen just yet.**

 **What do you think should happen with Bonnie and Damon next? Hopefully Kai doesn't come in-between them...**

 **Please review & let me know what you think!**


	8. Chapter 8

**(Damon's POV)**

I feel like I'm back at square one. Elena and I have crumbled and fallen apart once again but this time I don't think we can fix it.

It seems like every time I find some happiness, it gets snatched away from me and I'm left to pick up the pieces and move on.

In a way, I'm not surprised by the current events unfolding in my life. The odds are never in my favor.

Actually, they never were. Yet I continue to get my hopes and think maybe this one time things will work out, that things will go my way.

Ha, who am I kidding? I don't deserve happiness. Especially not with Elena.

I mean what did I expect? Our love was…tainted. The relationship started out from a fucking sire bond. I should have known then that the love between us would only end in heartbreak.

Not to mention I technically stole Elena from my brother. Maybe this is karma.

I don't know what to think anymore.

I tell myself to have no expectations, to expect nothing great to happen but every blue moon something, or shall I say someone, comes along and involuntarily makes me believe that I could find happiness.

Bonnie gives me hope. She makes me see things in a different perspective. I have to actually think about what I've said or done when it comes to her.

Despite being friends now, she doesn't put up with my bullshit. She stands her ground. Sure, it can be annoying sometimes but I think it's what I need. It's also one of the things I love about her.

The fact that we almost kissed, or that I almost kissed her is what I can't stop tripping over.

It almost scares me to know that I actually wanted to kiss her. And I don't get scared easily.

Yes, I was drunk and hurt over Elena but that wasn't all that was fueling my desires. I wanted to know how her lips would feel against mine and what they would taste like.

I imagine her lips tasting like sweet, sweet honey. Her tongue adding a hint of tanginess and her warm breath filling my lungs.

But this is wrong.

I shouldn't be thinking these things about my best friend. Friends don't fantasize about kissing each other. Or do they?

Classic Damon would be trying to find ways to win back Elena and to somehow figure out a way to be with her forever even though I know she wants to be human.

I'm not doing that this time.

This time I will be smart and not make irrational decisions. I'll just let things happen the way they're supposed to instead of forcing it.

But this thing with Bonnie, I'm not sure how to go about.

Part of me wants to tell her that our almost kissed has awakened something in me. Something that I can't quite explain. The other part of me wants to keep my mouth shut and play it cool.

Which part of myself should I listen to?

* * *

Bonnie and Elena were currently huddled up in the back corner of a café place on campus. Because Elena was so distraught, Bonnie offered to buy Elena a drink so they could hang out and talk.

"I just feel so bad, Bonnie." Elena whined. "First I break Stefan's heart, now I'm breaking Damon's."

Bonnie just continued to give Elena sympathetic looks while Elena aired out all of her dirty laundry.

"I guess I really am Katherine's twin. Not only do I look like her, now I act like her too." She mumbled to herself.

"Don't compare yourself to Katherine. She was a bitch who didn't care who she hurt. You actually care." Bonnie reassured.

The brim of Elena's eyes began to water. She was trying not to cry. She was tired of crying.

"I don't even know what to feel right now. Part of me is upset for Damon withholding the cure from me," Elena lowered her voice so no one could hear. "The other part of me feels guilty because of what I did with Stefan."

"Why didn't you tell me you knew about the cure?" Elena asked.

"I didn't feel it was my place to tell you. That's why I gave it to Damon because I thought he would be happy to give it to you." Bonnie replied.

"You know," Bonnie started. "I'm not defending what he did because it was wrong, but I understand why he did what he did."

Elena looked confused. "What do you mean?"

"I mean…he was scared to lose you. He knew that once he gave you the cure things would change. Not just you becoming human again but your relationship and possibly your feelings for him." Bonnie explained.

"I get that…but what he doesn't realize is the cure isn't changing my feelings…it's Stefan." Elena revealed.

"Ever since we kissed I haven't stopped thinking about him. I haven't felt like that about him in a while. It's strange but familiar at the same time."

Although her friend was hurting and in a difficult predicament, Bonnie was glad Elena was opening up to her. They hadn't been able to sit and have a heart to heart in a long time.

It sort of reminded Bonnie of the old days, before the Salvatore's were here and things weren't so screwed up. Their only worries back then were maintaining decent grades to remain on the cheerleading team.

"You still love him, don't you?" Bonnie questioned but she already knew the answer.

"I do," Elena choked up. "I don't even know if I ever really stopped."

"I think when Stefan is back to being Stefan you should talk to him. Tell him how you feel." Bonnie suggested.

"And say what? Your brother just broke up with me and now I think I still have feelings for you. Take me back?" Elena responded sarcastically.

Bonnie sighed. "I'm serious, Elena. You should talk to him."

"I know, I know." On the inside Elena was nervous about talking to Stefan. She didn't know if he would like what she had to say and she was afraid of being rejected.

"Maybe this isn't right." Elena thought aloud. "Maybe I shouldn't take the cure."

"Oh c'mon, Elena. We both know you want to be human more than anything." Bonnie was not about to let Elena talk herself out of this. "Let's not think about Stefan or Damon for a minute and just think about what you really want."

Elena stared Bonnie right in the eye and said "I want to be human again."

"I know," Bonnie placed her hand on Elena's knee and gave her an affectionate squeeze.

A couple of days had passed before Elena finally got the courage to speak with Damon. She apologized for the way things went down between them.

He apologized as well and told her he regretted not telling her about the cure.

She made her final decision that she was going to take the cure. Damon was happy that she was finally getting what she wanted but deep down he ached knowing his Elena would be gone soon.

There romantic relationship was over but Elena hoped that they could be friends in the near future. They both knew they wouldn't be seeing much of each other after this because it would be too awkward.

Damon needed his space to grieve his failed relationship and Elena needed hers as well. She also wanted to get Stefan's humanity back so that he would know that she was choosing him for the last time.

 _No more going back and forth_ , Elena thought to herself.

After she retrieved the cure from Damon, she made her way back to campus and went straight to Bonnie's. She wanted to do this with Bonnie by her side.

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

Elena had called me not too long ago to inform me that she had the cure and was on her way back to the dorms. She actually sounded happy for the first time this week and it made me excited for her.

Before I knew it, Elena had arrived and was impatiently knocking on my door.

I let her in and she immediately showed me the cure. It was in a small tube and the substance looked like a gooey red liquid.

She looked excited but also a little nervous.

"Are you sure you want to do this right now?" I asked.

"Yes, there's no point in waiting." She replied.

I smiled at her, "Okay." I latched onto her hand for support and to let her know I was here no matter what happened.

She carefully opened the tube and gave me one last look before she downed it.

For a minute I didn't breathe as I watched her reaction to see if it worked or if it completely failed. She didn't look any different but I had assumed it worked.

"So…how do you feel?" She was just standing there with a blank expression on her face and it was making me nervous.

"I feel fi-" before she could finish her sentence, she bent down in pain, holding on to her head.

My eyes widened in fear. "Elena!" I held on to her as she groaned out in pain. I didn't know what was happening.

The pain seemed to have stopped all of a sudden because she straightened back up. Her face was masked with shock.

"I remember everything," She finally spoke. "I remember all the stuff with Damon and what happened between me and Stefan."

The memories she had erased a while ago were back and now the empty holes that had caused her confusion were being filled. She was connecting the dots.

In an instant her eyelids were becoming droopy and she looked wore out.

"I think I need to sleep." Were her last words before she passed out.

I caught her before she could hit the floor and laid her on my bed. I didn't know if this was just a side effect of taking the cure or if I should have been really worried. I was hoping for the first one.

Reluctantly I called Damon to come. I didn't know what to do or who else to call and I figured he would want to check and see if she was going to be all right, despite them being broken up.

I knew no matter what he would always care about her.

We hadn't really spoken or seen each other since the day we almost kissed but I was hoping he'd miraculously forget about that.

When he arrived, he scanned me up and down before he walked inside. It honestly gave me chills the way he looked at me.

I told him everything that had happened and now we were both looking at her sleeping peacefully.

He walked up to her and swept her hair out of her face very gently. I looked away, acting like I hadn't seen the intimate gesture. Quite frankly it made me a little uncomfortable. I almost felt like I was intruding in my own room.

I turned to walk out of the room and he was in front of me.

We stared at each other for a few seconds before I spoke up.

"What?" I asked, as I crossed my arms in front of me.

"How are you?" his eyes darted from left to right.

My eyebrow lifted. "I'm fine…" _Why is he asking me this? I'm not the one who's passed out._

"Good, good." He cleared his throat. "So, uh-"

"How are you?" I cut him off.

"Me? I'm great." I wasn't convinced.

Pause.

 _Well this is awkward._

"Bonnie, I think we should talk about what happened between us." He forced out.

"What do you mean? Nothing happened." _I was hoping to avoid this conversation._

"Don't play dumb, Bon-Bon. It's not your style." He looked amused.

"I'm not, nothing happened," I said through clenched teeth. "This isn't really the best time to be talking about this." My eyes went to Elena's unconscious body.

"She's asleep, she can't hear us." He waved his hand.

I walked further away from Elena just in case.

"So when should we talk about this then?" Damon continued.

"Never because there's nothing to talk about."

"You are so in denial, it's hilarious." _He thinks this is funny. It's not._

"I am not!" I said defensively. "What do you want me to say, huh?"

"You want to me to acknowledge the fact that we almost kissed? Ok, yeah, we did." _He wanted to hear me talk so fine, I'll talk._

"You want me to say that I wanted you to kiss me even though I stopped it? Yes, that's true."

His eyebrows rose. _Maybe I shouldn't have said that._

"You wanted me to kiss you?" he slowly started coming closer to me with a cocky grin plastered on his face.

Even though I wanted to blush and cover my face, I stood my ground and looked straight at him. "I said that, didn't I?"

"Well that's good to hear because I wanted to kiss you too." He said in a nonchalant tone.

I rolled my eyes. "I know, I was there, remember?"

"No, I mean I _really_ wanted to kiss you. Not just because I was drunk or heartbroken _."_ I looked up at him then.

"Really?"

"Really." He was staring down at me with those blue orbs and I felt a tingle between my thighs.

 _Um, hello, earth to Bonnie. Elena's in the room._

I snapped out of my hypnotic trance and realized that we were flirting in front of Elena. She was asleep but that didn't make it right.

"Okay, you need to leave before she wakes up."

"What for?"

"You know _why."_

"All right, fine." He took his time getting his leather jacket and I knew he was doing this on purpose.

"Go," I started pushing him towards to door. "Leave."

"Wait, wait, wait, one more thing." He stopped.

Irritably, I asked "what?"

"You did say you wanted me to kiss you, right?" _Now he's just being a jerk._

I started hitting him and that smug grin on his face disappeared. "Ow, that hurts!" he complained.

"Get out of here!" I finally pushed him out the door and couldn't help but crack a smile when he was gone.

"Who were you talking to?" I heard a voice from across the room and my head snapped towards the sound to find Elena getting up.

"Elena, are you okay?" I quickly made my way to her side.

"Yea…what happened?"

"You took the cure and then you ended up passing out. You had me worried there for a sec."

"I'm ok," she reassured me. "I just feel like I've come out of a deep sleep."

"Well you were out for a good forty five minutes."

"I'm just glad you're okay." When I hugged her I could feel her heart beating again. It was beautiful.

We started laughing and tearing up and she preceded to tell me how happy she was. And that's all I've ever wanted Elena to be. That and be safe of course but it's a little hard to dodge danger around here.

Along with being human again, Elena had finally gotten her memories back. She told me she realized that Damon was the reason Stefan had broken up with her. She also remembered the sire bond and how dizzying her and Damon's relationship was.

Elena wanted to go find Stefan and talk to him but I convinced her to go to her room and get some rest. She still looked a little tired and although she didn't admit it, I could tell she needed more rest and to take it easy.

I walked her back to her room and gave her a huge hug before I left.

* * *

 _Several hours later_ …

I was laying in my bed thinking of everything that happened today. I couldn't believe the way things were working out.

Elena was human again and although she wasn't with Damon anymore, I knew she was happier than she had been in a long time.

Selfishly, I couldn't help but think that now that she wasn't with Damon, it gave me a little hope that things between Damon and I could flourish into something more.

The way he was flirting and looking at me today was something I had never experienced from him ever. It was new and exciting and it made me feel…good.

Don't get me wrong, I don't plan on jumping his bones the first chance I get just because he's single now. I still have to wonder what Elena would think if she knew how I felt about him.

But more importantly, how does he feel? Flirting is one thing but does he really have feelings for me? It's hard for me to wrap my brain around the idea.

Not because I don't think I deserve someone, but because he's Damon Salvatore. We used to hate each other. Well at least I know I hated him.

To think of how far we've come, from my first day meeting him, to me literally despising him, to an unexpected friendship, and now _love_ **.**

I closed my eyes and continued to daydream, letting myself doze off into a comfortable sleep.

When I opened my eyes about twenty minutes had passed. I checked my phone to look at the time when I saw I had four missed call from Elena.

My mind automatically went to the worst and I had to calm my heart before it jumped out of my chest.

 _Don't panic. Just call her back and see what's up._

 _Ring, ring, ring._

"Bonnie."

"Elena, is everything okay?"

Silence.

"Bonnie, I need you to meet me somewhere."

"Why, what's wrong?"

I heard what sounded like a male voice in the background but I couldn't exactly make out the words.

"Elena, tell me!"

"Just meet me in classroom 102, okay?" I could hear the rising panic in her voice.

"Elena, please. Who is there with you?"

"He told me to tell you he sends his regards."

"…Who?"

 _I asked a question I already knew the answer to and it made me sick to my stomach._

"Kai."

 _Click._

* * *

 **A/N:** Kai's back and he's got a human Elena.

What do you think he's up to?

Don't worry, Elena won't die and there will be no linking Bonnie and Elena's life together.

Damon is starting to realize he has romantic feelings for Bonnie and Elena now knows why her and Stefan broke up and how jacked up it was (TVD shade)

Tell me what you think will happen next and as always, leave tons of reviews!


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Sorry for the wait.**

* * *

Elena was still shaking from her encounter with Kai. She was semi jogging back to her dorm room to retrieve her phone so she could call Damon.

When she got to her room she immediately started looking for her phone. After a few seconds, she remembered when Kai was here he had slapped the phone out of her hand.

Elena decided to check underneath her bed and there it was. On the second ring, Damon answered.

"Elena?"

Damon! Damon, I need you to listen to me. Kai has Bonnie. I don't know where he's taking her or what he has planned but she needs our help."

"Fuck," Damon cursed. "How long ago did this happen?"

"About ten, fifteen minutes ago. You need to get here _now_."

"I'm already on my way." Damon assured.

Damon drove like a bat out of hell to get to Whitmore. When he arrived, he used his vampire abilities to get to Elena's room faster.

Elena opened her door and said "Hey."

"Are you all right?" Damon asked as he stepped inside.

Elena nodded her head. "Yeah…I'm a little shaken up but I'll be fine. I'm worried about Bonnie."

"You need to tell me everything that happened."

Elena preceded to tell Damon everything that happened from the time Kai came to her room to when she was forced to call Bonnie and how Bonnie gave herself over so Kai would let her go.

Damon was extremely pissed when Elena finished. He put his hand over his forehead and squeezed his temples out of frustration.

"Bonnie was right," he sighed.

"What do you mean?"

"I was convinced Kai had changed…somewhat. I thought maybe he wouldn't be as psychotic as he had been but I was wrong. She tried to tell me this but I brushed it off."

Elena tensed, realizing what Damon had said was true. Everyone had sort of forgot about Kai or tried to pretend he wasn't here. It was easy to do because he hadn't been bothering us but now he's back.

"This is all my fault." Damon whispered.

Elena stood. "No, it's not. We had no idea he was going to do this. We don't even know what he has planned but we'll figure it out. And we're gonna get Bonnie back."

"Not we, I am. You're staying here."

"Wait, what? No way, I'm coming with you." Elena went to open the door but Damon's hand stopped it.

" _Damon."_

"Did you forget that you're human now? You can't protect yourself and I have to be focused on getting Bonnie, not protecting you."

Elena stared Damon down but she knew he was right.

"I'm serious," Damon looked her straight in the eye. "Stay here."

And then he was gone.

Elena was frustrated. She knew Bonnie had become an important part of Damon's life, she could see that ever since he came back from the alternate universe but Bonnie was her best friend as well. She should be trying to do something, especially after everything she's been through.

After a few minutes of contemplating, Elena decided to seek help from the only person who she knew could really help her. Or at least she hoped.

 _Stefan._

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

 _Just when things were starting to get normal, shit like this happens._

I was on my way to meet Kai and Elena, trying to think of something, anything I could do to get her out of this. When I showed up to the classroom Elena had told me to meet them at, I stopped right outside to take a breath.

This could go bad or really really bad and I was hoping both of us could walk out of here but I knew it was unlikely.

I stepped inside the classroom, which only occupied the three of us, and found Elena sitting in one of the seats while Kai was slowly pacing in front.

He smiled when he seen me. "Bonnie, it's good to see you. You look great."

I fought hard to not roll my eyes. "Can you just tell me what you want so we can get this over with?"

"What's the rush? I mean do you have more important plans than to save your bestie?" He asked in a rhetorical, condescending manner.

"Or maybe," he continued. "You want to rush back and see Damon."

My heart jumped at the sound of his name but my facial expression gave nothing away. At least I hoped it didn't.

I had noticed Elena was awfully quiet and hadn't moved at all. It took me a second but I eventually realized she was under a spell. Kai had used magic to practically glue her to the seat and prevent her from saying anything.

When Kai had mentioned Damon she did give me a funny look however.

"Bon, you don't have to pretend with me. I know how you feel." He put his hand over his chest to emphasize his false empathy.

"I may not be a relationship expert but I know what unrequited love looks like."

My eyes widened slightly. _He can't know…_

"And I'm sorry to say this but Damon doesn't love you. He loves his precious Elena. And I think you know this as well."

"Stop it. Stop it right now! I'm tired of you playing around, speaking on matters you know absolutely _nothing_ about. Tell. Me. What. You. Want." There was a slight tremble inching up my finger tips that I couldn't control.

"Oh, Bonnie, I didn't mean to make you mad, I was just telling you the ugly truth." He walked over by Elena.

"Isn't that right, Elena?" he whispered in her ear. She looked disgusted to be that close to him.

He laughed, knowing Elena couldn't speak.

 _Sick and twisted bastard._

"Okay!" he clapped his hands together loudly. "How about this; you come with me and I'll let Elena go."

"So we're making deals now? You still haven't told me what you want."

"Don't worry, that'll come later. It's a conversation I prefer to have in private." His eyes darted to Elena.

"So let Elena go and tell me now."

"Alright." He simply agreed. All of a sudden my body was being forced towards him and he grasped on to my elbow to keep me from running away. Elena was released but hesitated to go.

"Go, Elena."

"No, I don't trust him."

"I said go, I'll be fi-ahhh" Kai had took me by the shoulders and began chanting.

He was taking my powers away. Draining me of life is what it felt like. I heard Elena screaming but it sounded like background noise.

"What are you doing to her!? Stop!" Elena begged.

Elena went to throw something at Kai but he just dodged it and slammed Elena to the ground. When the pain finally stopped I begged Elena to go before he really hurt her.

My last words to her before she ran out were to find Damon.

He'd know what to do.

* * *

Defying Damon's orders as usual, Elena called Stefan for help. Surprisingly he had picked up and told her where he was when she asked.

The conversation was on the phone was quick and now she was headed to meet him. She couldn't help but feel nervous.

Stefan without his humanity was very unpredictable but despite everything, she trusted him.

Elena find herself located at a bar not far from Whitmore. She walked in eyeing the scarce crowd and spotted him quickly.

"Stefan." She greeted. "Thanks for meeting with me."

He gulped down a drink. "So what do you want?"

"Bonnie's in trouble and I need your help. Kai-"

"Why don't you ask your boyfriend for help?" He sneered. "I'm sure he'd love to play hero for a day."

"Damon doesn't want me involved because I could get hurt." Elena sighed. "But I don't care what he wants me to do, Bonnie needs us."

"And what makes you think I would want to help any of you?" He got significantly closer, making Elena's breath quicken.

"Because…"

Stefan stared at her like he was seeing her again for the first time.

"What?" Elena asked.

"Your heart," he said. "It's beating…how is that possible?"

"I don't have time to explain."

"How is this possible?" He asked again, with a little more edge to his voice.

"I took the cure!" Elena blurted out but no one around seemed to have noticed or cared.

Stefan's face was a mixture of confusion, amazement, and...hope?

Elena lowered her voice, "Bonnie got the cure from 1994 and gave it to Damon to give to me….and I took it."

Stefan shook his head slightly. "I can't believe this. You're human again."

"Yea…" for some reason Elena started feeling emotional. Maybe it was the way Stefan was looking at her like she was the only person in the room.

"Stefan I need your help and in order for that to happen I need you to turn your emotions back on."

Stefan eyed Elena quizzically. "Is this a trick?"

"No," she said. "We just need you to come back." Elena instinctively put her hands on Stefan's face.

" _I_ need you to come back to me…" she whispered.

Stefan and Elena both had unshed tears in their eyes as Stefan let his humanity and emotions breakthrough after months of being empty inside.

Elena could see his pupils' dilate, his eyes become a brighter green. He was back.

"Elena..." Stefan exhaled. She smiled so big and bright and crushed him to her arms.

"I missed you." Elena whispered in his ear. Stepping back from the hug, they both gleamed at each other.

"Welcome back." Elena teased.

Stefan's face turned serious after he remembered why she came there in the first place.

"What do you need me to do?"

* * *

Kai had me locked up in some kind of underground cell. I didn't even want to know how he found this place, I just wanted to get out.

The medium sized cell was cold, hard, and smelled like car exhaust or some type of oil. This wasn't good. I needed to talk my way out of this since I didn't have my powers at the moment.

"Is this really necessary?" I asked. "It's not like I can do anything, you have my powers."

"You may not have your powers but you're smart, which means you could find a way to escape me if I let you out."

 _Damnit._

"Well what if you just tie me to that chair over there." I motioned with my head.

His eyebrow raised. "With what?"

"I don't know, you're the evil mastermind here. Think of something."

Kai took a minute to study his surroundings for and he actually looked like he was in deep thought.

"I'll be right back. Don't move." He smiled.

 _Ha-ha very funny._

When he left, I knew I only had a minute or two before he'd be back so I tugged on the lock as hard as I could but it didn't budge. I wish I had a bobby pin then maybe I could have picked the lock.

For some stupid reason I tried to use my magic but it was no use.

 _I'm useless without my magic,_ the negative voice said to me.

I heard footsteps approaching and I knew I was out of time. I placed myself in the exact position I was in before he left so he wouldn't know I was trying to escape.

The person who came around the corner shocked me but I felt so relieved. His wide blue eyes met mine and then he started approaching me.

"Damon," I whispered. "How did you find me?"

"I tracked you by your perfume scent. It was strong." He kneeled to snap the lock and chains that were keeping me hostage.

"You better hurry, he'll be back soon." And not a second later, Kai was in the room.

"Damon!" I screamed, trying warn him but by the time Damon turned around, Kai had plunged a syringe full of vervain into his neck.

"No!" I roared. Damon's body fell to the floor and Kai had a smirk on his face.

"So maybe Damon does really love you," Kai stated. "I guess I was wrong about one thing." He shrugged his shoulders.

I noticed Kai had a bunch of wire in his hands. He lifted it up to show me.

He put Damon's hands together and tied them so tight it made small trickles of blood descend. Next, he tied his feet and then he came over to open the cell and dragged Damon's body in.

He grabbed me and sat me down in a chair as he relocked the cell. The wires he tied around my wrists and ankles weren't as tight as it was on Damon but it was still uncomfortable, digging into my skin.

"Now," he placed his hands on his knees and bent down to meet me at eye level. "Let me tell you my true intentions for today."

I lifted my chin, never breaking eye contact with him. "Talk."

"Bonnie, have you ever wanted to be a queen or a ruler of some sort?"

I squinted my eyes at him. "What?"

"You heard me. Haven't you ever wished you were the one in charge of everything? Made all the rules, the decisions. Made people afraid of _you."_

"Not at all." I automatically said.

"C'mon Bonnie, I know that you're tired of being afraid. Tired of people thinking they can run all over you. Imagine a world where you didn't have to worry about any of that stuff, where you could be safe."

"I wouldn't have to worry about anything if _you_ weren't here." I sneered.

"That's not true and you know it." Kai's voice changed into a much more serious tone.

"You know even if I wasn't here there would be something else out there you would be scared of. Just like you were before you even met me." I averted my eyes away for the first time since he started talking.

For some reason I felt like I wanted to cry because what he was saying was true. No matter who I defeat there's always someone else that's going to come for me. I'll always be looking behind my back.

"What's the point of this?" I snapped. "Things will never be the way I want them to so why are you telling me this?"

"Because I have a solution to all of your problems." I didn't respond so he continued.

"I found a spell that would let me create a new dimension."

I gasped. "Impossible."

"Not impossible. All I need is another powerful witch by my side to complete it."

I started shaking my head. "What makes you think I would ever help you?"

"Because deep down….you want this too."

* * *

 **A/N: Again, I apologize for the wait. Holiday season is making everything busier for me. I hope I haven't lost you guys. You don't ever have to worry about me abandoning this story but just know I might not update as often as I was before. Also, sorry for the lack of bamon in this chapter. I'll be sure to make up for it later on.**

 **Anyway, Kai is crazy...or is he a genius?**

 **Is Bonnie actually contemplating Kai's idea of creating another dimension with him?**

 **Stefan is back, bitches! (Stelena is on it's way too)**

 **Who do you think will rescue Damon and Bonnie?**

 **Leave it in the comments!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Please don't hate me. I know it's been like two months since I updated but I'm still here. I hope I haven't lost you guys.**

 **On a happier note, we're on chapter 10! This is the farthest I've ever gotten with a story and I believe the longest chapter I've written. I hope this makes up for my long absence.**

 **Before you start reading I wanted to address any confusion with my writing. I tend to go back and forth between first person and third person so I hope it makes sense when you guys are reading. I usually like writing from Bonnie's POV the most but sometimes I switch it up so the story can be told from all angles. Another thing, if a sentence is italicized, that means the character is having thoughts inside their head. If a word is italicized, then that just means I'm emphasizing the word. Hope all of this makes sense.**

 **Anyway, enjoy chapter 10!**

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

 _What makes you think I would ever help you?_

 _Because deep down…you want this too…_

Kai was right. Deep down I did want this.

There were many times I wanted to be free of all my supernatural responsibilities. Although I love being a witch and having the gift of magic, it's a lot of power for one person to have and it can be a lot to bear sometimes. Especially since my use of magic revolves around helping my friends and saving my loved ones.

Imagining myself as a "queen" as Kai put it, would be amazing. To never have to worry about anything or anyone coming after me. Living in peace and being worshipped like a goddess…

I know it's incredibly selfish of me to have these secret thoughts but in reality that's all they are. Thoughts.

I would never leave my friends behind just for the sake of my own happiness. I couldn't live with myself. Not to mention the fact that I'd be running off with Kai, the person that I loathe with everything in me.

If Kai is really dumb enough to think that he can convince me to use my magic and create a new dimension with him, then I'll let him think that. This seems to be the only way I'll ever make it out of here alive.

But it's not just me in here, its Damon's life that's at stake too. (No pun intended)

I can't let my feelings for him manifest. It will show all over my face and then my cover will be blown. Kai will know that I'm just playing him and then we'll be dead.

If I can't save myself the least I can do is save Damon. He went out of his way to come and find me. His attempt ended in failure but the simple fact that he was here, that he showed up when I really needed someone meant everything to me. Seeing his beautiful, stubborn, determined face come through that door had made my heart swell.

God I love him.

No matter what, I'm not going down without a fight.

* * *

Bonnie sat extremely still, contemplating Kai's words.

Her hands and ankles were still tightly bound by wire so there was no way of actually moving away from Kai's face. He stared into her eyes, waiting for a sassy comeback to slip out of her mouth but she was surprisingly silent.

After a few moments of zoning out, Bonnie finally blinked and came back to reality. She zeroed in on Kai's face and replied, "You're right."

Kai's eyes unintentionally widened, revealing his shocked state. That definitely wasn't the response he was expecting but it did indeed make him happy to hear Bonnie Bennett tell him he was right.

Bonnie made artificial tears spring to her eyes to make her words more believable. "I want that for myself…because I know things will never go my way here. I'll always be known as Bonnie the witch or Bonnie the sacrificial lamb. But never a hero or a leader. And definitely not a _queen._ "

Kai was delighted to hear her breaking down. He had a sinister grin on his face and the more Bonnie revealed her feelings, the wider it got.

Damon was slowly gaining consciousness as Bonnie continued to talk. He was half listening to their conversation and he couldn't believe what he was hearing. Bonnie was willing to run off into another dimension with Kai? _No that can't be right, I must have misheard Bonnie,_ Damon thought to himself.

"Sleeping beauty is up." Kai remarked.

Bonnie didn't dare turn her head to look at Damon. She couldn't let herself be vulnerable in front of Kai.

"Bonnie," Damon called out in a groggy voice.

Kai looked at Bonnie to peep her reaction. All she could do was turn her head and keep her eyes down, staring at an invisible spot on the ground.

"Bonnie," Damon tried again but she wasn't responding or looking at him. Kai chuckled.

"Your little Bon Bon doesn't want to talk to you, Damon." Kai said, which made Damon irritated at the fact Kai used _his_ nickname for Bonnie.

"She made a choice to go with me. Leave you and the rest of the Mystic Falls gang behind, isn't that right, Bonnie?" Kai divulged.

When Bonnie didn't answer right away, Kai walked back over to Bonnie and hovered right in front of her. He forcefully grabbed her face so she could look at him. "Isn't that right?"

"Hey!" Damon imposed. "Get your hands off of her!" He grabbed the railings of the cell and they immediately burned his skin.

"Ahhh!" Damon pulled his hands back quickly. "Shit." He cursed under his breath.

"Did I forget to mention I laced the cell with vervain? My bad." Kai replied sardonically.

Damon growled.

Bonnie swallowed hard before answering. "Yes, that's right."

Damon's eyebrows scrunched in disbelief. "You can't be serious, Bonnie!"  
"Kai, can you please untie me so we can get on with the spell? I'm ready to get out of here." Bonnie completely ignored Damon and kept her focus on Kai.

"Why of course Ms. Bennett, let me do the honors." Kai focused on the wire until it snapped and unraveled. Bonnie grabbed her red whelped wrists and rubbed them to soothe the pain.

"Sorry about that," Kai apologized. "I had to take precautions."

Bonnie nodded as if the say she understood. She stood up and accidently glanced at Damon and noticed he was looking at her as if he didn't recognize her.

She knew how crazy all of this sounded but she had to go along with it until she could get them both out of there.

Kai pulled a folded paper from his back pocket and handed it to Bonnie. It looked old and worn, slightly torn on the edges, most likely from being ripped out of a grimoire.

"Here's the spell. Memorize it. Oh, and by the way," Kai latched on the Bonnie's elbow. "If you try anything I will kill you."

A chill ran down Bonnie's spine at how nonchalant his threat sounded. She knew he wasn't kidding.

As Bonnie was memorizing the spell and going over every word, Damon interrupted her concentration.

"Bonnie, listen to me. I don't know what American Psycho over there told you or made you believe but you don't really wanna do this. You _can't_ do this."

Bonnie kept her back facing Damon as he continued to plead with her.

"If you're just doing this to save me then _don't_. This isn't the way."

"Not everything is about you, Damon." Bonnie replied softly.

Damon sighed. "What about Elena and Caroline? What about Matt and Tyler? What about _me?_ I thought you lov-"

" _Don't._ " Bonnie cut him off. "You promised you wouldn't use that against me."

Things were silent for a moment.

"Elena and Caroline will be fine without me. They always have been." Bonnie's nose began to burn, a clear indication that she was about to cry. "And you have Stefan and Elena."

"I don't know if you forgot but I don't have Elena anymore. And maybe I don't want Elena, maybe I want someone else."

A slight gasp escaped from Bonnie's mouth at Damon's words. _Is he saying what I think he's saying?_ Bonnie questioned.

"What can I do to make you stay? You want me to tell you that I've developed _feelings_ for you? That somehow, someway I started thinking of you as more than a friend?"

Bonnie still hadn't turned around to face him so he continued to declare his true feelings. Feelings he had kept hidden from not only her, but from himself.

"Even though you're the most judgmental, annoying, and stubborn girl I know, you're also the most selfless, strong, and amazing girl I know."

The tears Bonnie had been trying to hinder couldn't be held back any longer. Hot tears streamed down both sides of her face, blazing until it hit the cold hard earth.

"Defining all possible global scenarios…I might wanna be with you."

He heard Bonnie sniffling but she wouldn't say a word.

"Damn it, Bonnie! Look at me!" Damon exclaimed.

Bonnie slowly turned around and looked at him for the first time for what felt like an eternity. His eyes studied her face to see if any of his words had gotten through to her.

"I'm sorry, Damon." Was all she said.

Damon's face morphed into defeat. He couldn't convince her to not go through with this so now he would have to watch her get swept into a portal with Kai.

 _It can't end like this,_ Damon thought. He began to scrutinize the entire situation and a light bulb went off in his head. _She's not really going through with this. She must have a plan up her sleeve that she didn't include me in._ Damon rationalized.

" _Wow_ ," Kai enunciated. "That was like one of the best soap opera scenes I've ever seen. I mean Damon almost had me fooled into thinking he _actually_ cares about you. But then I remembered him and Elena and I thought nah, there's no way he would give her up for Bonnie."

"As entertaining as that was, I think it's time to go. Bonnie?" Kai placed his palms up and moved them forward towards Bonnie. She wiped the remainder of her tears on her sleeve before placing her hands in Kai's.

Bonnie and Kai bowed their heads, closed their eyes, and began to chant:

" _ **Elementum recolligo Huic commodo locus mihi vestri vox.**_

 _ **Elementum ego unda dico vos. Permissum Pluit es est meus nos sic vadum is exsisto"**_

A wind that was not present a minute ago appeared and began to circle around the two.  
Dust and tiny particles from the ground became swept up and pulled into the magical induced wind.

Bonnie could tell just how powerful the spell was after only reciting two lines. Her energy was mildly decreasing so she knew she had to switch it up now before she was too weak to finish her plan.

Bonnie blindsided Kai when she changed her words into a completely different spell. A spell that would return her own magic to her. The magic that Kai sucked out of her earlier, nearly making her pass out.

" _ **Accerso alius sententia ut mihi, phasmatis of interregnum ego dico, solvo meus mens mei, ego dico phasmatis audite meus placitum meus mens quod iacio**_ – "

Kai finally realized what Bonnie was doing but it was too late. She had her magic back.

"No! What are you doing!?" Kai shouted.

Bonnie immediately let go and struck Kai across the room. She quickly undid the lock and chain that was keeping Damon secured.

"Come on, let's go."

Before they could get through the exit, Kai grabbed Bonnie by the back of her hair and slammed her down. Damon's face morphed into a monster and he lunged for Kai, only for Kai to snap his neck with the snap of his fingers.

Kai picked Bonnie up roughly by the shoulders. "Didn't I tell you not to try anything?" he spat. "Now I'm gonna have to kill you."

Bonnie untangled herself out of his strong hold and swiftly kicked him the balls. He doubled over in pain and hit the ground with his knees. Bonnie balled her fist and punctured Kai's cheek. Blood splattered out of his mouth from her continuous blows.

"You're so weak." Kai smiled, showing off his bloody teeth.

His hand reached out and tripped Bonnie, causing her to fall and twist her ankle.

"AHHH!" Her ankle snapped.

Now Kai had the advantage and he took the opportunity to grab some loose wire that was hanging in the corner. He wrapped it around Bonnie's neck several times and pulled her up from the ground. He squeezed as she tried her hardest to fight back but she was losing her breath all too quickly.

Bonnie sputtered and gasped for air while her hands tried to loosen the wire. Her nose was bleeding profusely from using all her energy on spells and now her vision was getting dimmer.

Accepting this death as her fate, Bonnie stopped fighting back.

There was no air left to breathe and her body was shutting down. Right before she hit the ground, Kai's grip loosened and the wire came off.

Bonnie was barely conscious but she knew she heard Kai scream. She had no idea what was going on but whatever it was, it had saved her.

Stefan and Elena had come just in the nick of time.

Kai's screams were a result of Stefan biting into his neck. Stefan slammed Kai's head against the wall and completely knocked him out.

Elena was trailing right behind Stefan and noticed both Damon and Bonnie were lying on the floor.

"Oh my god!" Elena cried.

"You get Bonnie and I'll get Damon." Stefan instructed.

Elena ran to Bonnie's side and cradled her. "Bonnie, can you hear me? You're gonna be okay."

Bonnie had her eyes closed but she recognized Elena's voice and knew she was safe. Elena tried getting Bonnie to stand but she yelped in the process.

"What's wrong?" Elena asked apprehensively.

"My ankle." Bonnie squeaked.

"Stefan, I think her ankle is broken. Can you feed her some of your blood?"

Stefan instantly bit into his wrist and held it against Bonnie's mouth as she gently sucked until her ankle was healed and she had some of her energy back.

"Are you okay?" Elena delicately swept Bonnie's hair out of her face.

"I'll be fine." Bonnie reassured. "Just get me out of here."

Elena wrapped Bonnie's arm around her neck and slowly walked her and Bonnie out of the torture chamber.

* * *

"Hey, Stefan." Caroline smiled.

Stefan strolled up alongside Caroline who was sitting at the bar in the Mystic Grill.

"Hi, Caroline." He greeted in return. "How have you been?"

"Stefan I know you're not here to make small talk so what is it? What do you need?"

"All right," Stefan sighed. "You're right, I need to talk to you."

"So talk."

"I would much rather have this conversation with your humanity back on."

"Really, Stefan? You think I'm that easy? I don't think so." Caroline replied in a sassy manner.

"Okay, fine. I just wanted to let you know that Kai almost killed Bonnie and Damon last night. You know Elena and Bonnie really need you right now."

"Well I'm glad Bonnie's not dead. Can't say the same for Damon."

"Bonnie could really use your comfort right now." Stefan egged on.

"No can do. I'm emotionally unavailable right now."

"Look," Stefan leaned in closer. "I know you're trying to avoid the loss and pain you'll feel once you turn it back on but you can't run from it forever. Wouldn't it be better to just face it head on?"

"I never said I would be like this forever, I said a _year_ so please stop over exaggerating. And if all you're gonna do is whine about me not having my humanity on then you can leave because you're wasting your breath." Caroline motioned her hand towards the door.

Stefan was quiet for a moment as he thought over what else he wanted to talk about.

"There is something else I wanted to mention."

One of Caroline's eyebrows hiked up as she waited for Stefan to continue.

"I also wanted to talk about what we did together."

"What did we do?" Caroline smirked.

"We killed innocent people, Caroline." Stefan said in a faint voice.

"I only remember us having a good time. The partying, the drinking, the dancing, the _almost_ kiss we had."

"Yeah, I know. About that…"

Caroline rolled her eyes. "Here we go."

"Your friendship means a lot to me, Care and I wouldn't ever wanna ruin it. You get that, right?" Stefan's face was so serious, Caroline couldn't help but laugh.

"Oh relax, Stefan. I'm not Katherine. It's not like I'm gonna become obsessed with you or anything like that."

Stefan loosened up a little and smiled.

"I'll admit there was a bit of a crush there but I'm over it." Caroline stated casually.

Stefan's thick eyebrows shot up. "You're over it?"

"Yup! So please, don't give me the friendship speech."

Stefan chuckled.

"Plus there's no way we could ever be a thing because you're still in love with Elena. And she's most likely still in love with you too."

Stefan lost his smile and sighed. "Is it that obvious?"

"Duh! The whole world knows you two still love each other. Me personally, I've always liked her better with you than Damon."

Stefan folded his lips to keep from grinning. He missed talking to Caroline.

"When you guys get back together just remember I called it first." Caroline beamed.

"Ehh I don't know if that'll ever happen but you were right about one thing. I do still love her." Stefan admitted.

"Then why are you sitting here talking to me?"

Stefan bumped his shoulder against Caroline's. "Because I miss my friend."

Caroline let a genuine smile spread across her face.

"Well then as my friend I'm asking you to give me time."

Stefan placed his hand on top of Caroline's. "Okay."

They continued to talk and catch up for a little while longer until Caroline decided to leave. Walking away from The Grill she couldn't stop thinking about what Stefan said. Bonnie was hurting and Stefan missed her. She didn't want to care, but deep down inside she knew it was time to come back. The grievance that was about to hit her was gonna be a bitch but with her friends by her side, she could get through it.

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

My eyes fluttered open.

I examined my surroundings and realized I wasn't in my own room.

 _I'm in Damon's room._

This room was all too familiar. I instantaneously had flashbacks of being stuck in the 1994 prison world. Going through Damon's room after he was gone and almost committing suicide in his own bathroom.

I shook my head to remove those retched memories. I didn't want to think about that right now.

The door slowly cracked open. "Hey, you're awake."

Damon stepped in and walked to the bedside I was laying on.

I sat myself up to talk. "What happened? My mind is a little fuzzy."

"Kai happened." Damon sneered. "But good thing Stefan saved our asses."

"That's right," I sighed. "Stefan stopped Kai from strangling me to death." I instinctively put my hand to my neck to check for scars but there were none.

"Stefan healed you." Damon filled in my unspoken questions.

I nodded.

"Is Kai dead?" I hoped.

"Unfortunately, no. But he's gonna have one hell of a headache when he wakes up."

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"I'm fine, you know I heal quickly. But you," Damon cradled the right side of my face. "You could have been killed, Bonnie."

I sighed.

"Why didn't you tell me what you were planning on doing?"

"How could I?" I opposed. "Kai was in the room the whole time and if I had told you, it would have made things too obvious."

"You still should have told me." Damon pouted. "I was actually worried that joker had gotten inside your head."

I scoffed. "I can't believe you _actually_ thought I would go off with him."

"I'll admit, you had me fooled for a minute but then I caught on to your plan in no time."

"Mm hmm, right."

They both grinned at each other.

"Damon, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, of course."

It was time to address the elephant in the room.

"Did you really mean all that stuff you said? You know…when you thought I was leaving…"

Damon's adam's apple bobbed as he visibly swallowed. "I did."

A sound of relief escaped from my lips.

"I'm happy to hear that…but what about Elena?"

Damon shrugged. "What about Elena? We're not together anymore."

"I know, it's just-"I was trying to find the right words. "I don't want to have to compete with Elena. I know you still love her and let's be honest, you probably always will…"

"I do love Elena, Bonnie. And you're right, I probably always will."

My shoulders sunk at his confession.

"But…you don't ever have to worry about competing with Elena because I don't want Elena…I want you." He lifted my chin to meet his eyes and I could see that he was telling the truth.

"I want you too."

"I know." He smirked. I hit his shoulder.

"Way to ruin the moment." I laughed.

Damon kissed my hand. "It doesn't have to be ruined."

"Well I'm about to ruin it some more."

"Uh oh, what is it? Tell daddy what's wrong." Damon wiggled his eyebrows.

"Damon!" I put my hand over my face to cover my snickering.

"Okay, okay, I'll stop." He wiped the stupid grin from his face and straightened up.

I placed my hand on top of his. "I wanted to say that as much as I want this to work, for _us_ to work, there's always a possibility that it won't. And if that happens then things will be awkward between us and I'll lose your friendship. I don't wanna lose you, Damon."

Damon squeezed my hand. "You're not gonna lose me, Bon. I'm always gonna be in your life. You can't get rid of me, remember? I'm like a fever you can't-"

"Shake, yeah, yeah, I know." I finished for him.

After a minute of grinning at each other like idiots, we fell into a comfortable silence. His thumb grazed my bottom lip and he caressed my jaw as his sapphire blue eyes burned into mine, asking for permission.

We started leaning closer towards each other when he whispered my name. "Bonnie…"

His mouth gently slanted over mine and we lingered for a moment before our lips parted.

 _I finally kissed Damon. This isn't a dream, I repeat, this isn't a dream._

We kept our faces close together even after pulling apart. He looked at me with those eyes from underneath his long eye lashes and my heart literally skipped a beat.

"Your lips are so soft." He whispered. His thumb remained grazing my bottom lip.

 _Knock, knock_

We pulled apart fast.

"Hey," Elena came in, oblivious to what was just going on.

I flashed her a phony smile.

"Can I talk to Bonnie?" Elena looked at Damon.

"Sure." Damon got up to leave but before he reached the door, he glanced at me with a sexy smirk.

I blushed a cherry red but Elena didn't notice.

Elena took over Damon's spot and stared at me for a moment before asking how I was.

"I'm not in any pain, I'm just wore out."

Elena took my hand. "I was so worried about you. After I told Damon what happened to you, he told me not to bud in but you know me, I couldn't just stand by and not do anything."

"You could have been hurt." I chastised.

"I had Stefan with me and plus, you'd do the same for me."

"You're right. So how'd you get Stefan to go along with you?" I wondered aloud.

"I just talked to him and told him we needed him." Elena shrugged.

I rolled my eyes. "You mean you told him _you_ needed him, right?"

Elena giggled. "Maybe."

"Gosh, Elena. That man really loves you."

"I know." She nodded.

"Have you told him how you've been feeling lately?"

"No, I haven't really had the chance to. Plus I don't want to rush into anything, he's been through enough heartache and so have I."

"I get it."

"But I didn't come in here to talk about Stefan, I came in here to talk about you…and Damon."

My heart stopped.

"What about…me and Damon?"

"I know you like him, Bonnie. And I think he likes you too."

"Elena…" I licked my lips and swallowed. "I don't just like him…I love him."

Elena's eyes widened in awe. "Wow…"

"Yeah…"

"Does he know how you feel?"

"Yes. I haven't exactly told him to his face but he knows." I confessed.

"…And does he feel the same?"

"I don't know. I mean I know there's feelings there but I don't know how deep they are."

"Wow." Elena repeated. "One minute you guys hate each other and the next you're in love."

"I know this all sounds crazy and I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner it's just I didn't feel right, you know? You and Damon haven't even been broken up that long and I'm already trying to move in on him. Some best friend, huh?"

Elena giggled in response. "It's definitely weird to think of you two together. But not because Damon's my ex, it's because it's _Damon_."

We both laughed at that.

"Why are you taking this so well? I thought you'd be upset."

"Bonnie, you're my sister. If you're happy, I'm happy for you." Elena held my hands. "Besides, it's about time you get a new man." Elena teased.

I scoffed playfully. "I can't believe you said that!"

Elena raised her hands, trying to display her innocent look.

"Here, scoot over." Elena got underneath the covers with me and we leaned into each other.

We both sighed in contentment. "I miss this."

Elena agreed.

"You know Damon and I had fun together but we weren't right for each other. Maybe you two are meant to be together."

"Maybe."

I closed my eyes and let myself drift back to sleep.

* * *

 **A/N: Bamon is canon! Bamon is real!**

 **Btw I know some people were wondering if I would make Steroline happen in this story and now you have your answer. No offense, but I hate steroline. I love them as friends only. Stelena, Bamon, and Klaroline are my otps so those are the ships I'll most likely always write about.**

 **If you're still sticking with this story, please leave a comment and let me know what you want to see happen with Bamon. Also tell me what's been your favorite chapter so far and why.**

 **Thanks for the support. It's what keep me going.**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Scream if you're excited that I updated. Chapter 11 is here!**

 **This chapter I wanted to cut the drama and keep it lighthearted, sweet, cute, etc. so hopefully you enjoy it.**

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

I pulled out my phone and texted Damon to let him know I was here.

Here being the Mystic Grill.

 _As usual._

I had gotten out of class early today so when Damon called to ask me if I wanted to meet him for a late lunch I agreed. I never told Damon this but I loved being able to spend as much time with him as I could.

It was tough trying to juggle my classes, school work, a boyfriend – _or at least I think Damon was my boyfriend_ , practicing spells, and being prepared for impending doom.

Thankfully I hadn't seen Kai in the two weeks that had passed since he kidnapped me but I knew he was still alive and I didn't put it past him to try and come for me again. He was seriously crazy, his ridiculous plan of creating another dimension was one I never heard of but he was dead set on fulfilling his own desires.

I couldn't stop the tiny hairs on the back of my neck from standing up. Just thinking about what could have happened had Stefan and Elena not swooped in at the time.

 _Yikes._

I walked to one of the smaller tables that were set for two and swung my legs on one the high chairs, not realizing someone was sitting at the other end. I looked up from my phone to see Enzo smirking at me.

"Bonnie!" He exclaimed like he was happy to see me.

"My, you're looking ravishing." He took a quick glance at my chest.

 _Creep._

"Enzo," I forced a tight smile on my face. "I didn't see you there. What are you doing here?"

" _Obviously_." He remarked. "Just thought I'd come and have a quick drink. I heard the witch was back in town."

My eyebrow went up. "Oh?"

"Yeah I mean when you were stuck on the other side I thought you were gone for good."

"It wasn't the other side, it was a prison world for your information." I was starting to get irritated and I think it was showing.

"My mistake." The amusement was evident in his eyes. I think he liked annoying people.

I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Right, well I'm gonna switch tables."

"Why don't you stay? I'll buy you a drink."

"No thanks. I'm meeting someone."

"For a date?"

"Something like that."

"Is this fella someone I know?"

I pointedly turned my head towards him. "Are you always this nosy?"

He laughed but didn't answer. Now he was staring.

"What?"

"You have beautiful eyes."

 _Um…okay?_

Normally in this type of situation I would just take the compliment, thank the person and leave but I couldn't help but wonder why Enzo was openly flirting with me. We weren't friends, never have been, and he never showed any kind of interest in me before so he must want something, right?

While I was giving Enzo a funny look I felt a hand appear on my back.

"Hey, Bon Bon." Damon pulled me in for a surprisingly deep kiss. I unintentionally let a small moan escape from my mouth and into his.

When he finally let me go, he licked his bottom lip and slowly turned towards Enzo.

"Oh. Enzo. I didn't see you there." _Yes you did._

Enzo hummed in an amused yet slightly annoyed tone. "Yes, it seems I am invisible today." He cocked his head and looked at me.

"I'll leave you two lovebirds alone." Enzo got up and stopped by my side. "It was a pleasure talking to you, Bonnie."

He looked at Damon then, "I'm sure I'll see you around, Damon."

"Let's hope not." Damon flashed an over exaggerated smile.

When Enzo was out of reach, Damon replaced his spot and immediately started grilling me.

"What was that?"

"What was what?"

"You and Enzo being all buddy buddy with each other."

I scoffed. "It was nothing. I accidentally sat at the same table as him and we just started talking."

"What were you talking about?"

"Nothing important."

Damon grunted. "Well whatever it was I didn't like the way he was looking at you."

"You jealous?" I grinned.

"No, I just don't want anyone pushing up on my girl." The butterflies in my stomach sprang to life.

"So I'm your girl, huh?"

Damon pulled my chair close to his so his breath was fanning my face. "Yeah you are." He replied in a seductive tone.

"So this means we're officially boyfriend and girlfriend?" It sounded silly when I said it out loud but I wanted to be sure that we were on the same page since Damon never actually asked me to be his girlfriend.

"Of course," Damon smirked. "What did you think this was?"

I wasn't expecting him to ask that so I ended up stuttering my words.

"Well, I mean I knew we liked each other and, you know I just thought maybe- you never actually asked me-

Damon chuckled.

I glared at him. "Stop laughing at me."

"Relax, if you want me to ask you I will."

"Okay, ask me." _I said that a little too quickly_.

Damon took my hand and looked me right in the eyes. "Bonnie Bennett, will you be my girlfriend?"

"Hmm," I looked to the side as if I was actually contemplating my answer. He poked me on my right side where my tickle spot is and I buckled.

"Okay, yes!" I laughed. "I'll be your girlfriend." We leaned into each other until our lips met. I grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him closer to me. It was as if we were melting into each other.

"Mmm," he moaned. "If you keep that up we're gonna have to seal the deal right here and right now."

I smacked his arm.

Damon and I hadn't had sex yet so that definitely wasn't going to happen right now. _It did sound tempting though…_

"What are you daydreaming about?"

"What? Nothing, I was just thinking about how I can't wait for Spring break."

He cocked his eyebrow. "What's on the agenda for Spring break?"

"Sleep." He rolled his eyes.

"How _boring."_

"Hey, I've been working hard lately." I countered. "You know I took on some extra classes and did I tell you I switched my major again? Psychology for sure this time."

"Really? That doesn't sound like you to be so indecisive." He gave me a perplexed look.

"I know it's just I honestly don't know what I want to do with my life. Right now I'm just trying to get through college without completely failing."

"I'm sure you'll be great at whatever you decide to do."

That made me smile. "Thanks."

A young waitress with blonde hair come up to our table. "Excuse me, have you two been helped?"

"Nope. Bonnie?" Damon nodded toward me to order something.

"I'll just have a chicken wrap and do you want to share some fries?" I asked Damon.

"Sure. I'll have a bourbon, no ice."

"Ok, can I see your I.D.?"

Damon gave the waitress a questionable look. "Seriously? I come here-"

I sighed. "Damon, just show her your I.D."

He gritted his teeth. "Fine."

Once he showed his I.D. the waitress nodded and told us she'd be back with our orders soon.

"You know," Damon started. "You could have just let me compel her to give us a free meal."

"I knew that's what you wanted to do, that's why I cut you off. Compelling people for trivial and petty reasons is not nice."

"Nice?" Damon scoffed. "I'm not a nice person like you. You're what we call goody two shoes."

"Well someone has to be." I muttered.

"Stop being so uptight and let go a little."

"Excuse me?" I rolled my neck.

"Never mind," he sighed. "I don't want to argue with you."

"You said I'm too uptight. You know what? Just for that, you're not getting any of my fries."

"I specifically remember you asking me to share fries with you. Plus I'm paying for it."

"So?" I challenged.

When the waitress came back with our orders I immediately snatched the fries and stuffed about two or three of them in my mouth and licked the tips of my fingers.

"Delicious."

Damon narrowed his eyes at me. " _Rude."_

I smiled with a mouth full of fries.

* * *

After my lunch date with Damon we decided to go back to the boarding house and kick back. Damon put on a movie for us to watch but we ended up having a makeout session instead.

It felt good, I mean _really_ good but I had to cut it short so I could get back to campus. He insisted I stay the night but I knew what would happen if I did.

As much as I wanted to be intimate with Damon, I didn't think now was the right time to do it. Plus I was a little nervous about sleeping with him seeing as how the only person I'd ever slept with was Jeremy and that seemed like a lifetime ago.

I was at the front of my door putting the key in when I realized it was already unlocked.

 _Strange._

I stepped inside and to my surprise Caroline was sitting there…waiting for me…in my own dorm room.

"Finally!" She raised from where she was sitting. "I've been waiting for you for an hour."

I blinked.

"Caroline, what are you doing here? And how did you get in?"

She waved her hand dismissively. "I used a bobby pin."

"Come over here and sit down, I have a surprise for you." She patted the bed and smiled.

I was a little weary but I sat down anyway. "What's going on?"

"I'm back!" Caroline put her jazz hands up.

"Your back?" my face twisted in confusion.

I didn't understand what she meant until realization hit me and I softy gasped. "Your back." A slow smile began to creep onto my face.

She giggled at the expression on my face and I pulled her in for a tight hug.

"I missed you." I whimpered.

She rubbed my back. "I know, Bon. I missed you too."

"When did you…?"

"A few days ago. I just needed a little time to myself before I actually came back. You know, to reflect on things."

"I get it."

"Bonnie, I owe you an apology. You've been through so much and I haven't been there for you like I should and I'm sorry for that. And I'm sorry for any mean things I said to you while I wasn't myself."

"Caroline," I scolded. "You lost your mom. I didn't expect you to put your hurt aside and deal with mine. You needed to grieve, I just wish you had chosen a different way to do it."

"Truth be told I still am grieving. But I know my mom…" she swallowed. "My mom wouldn't have wanted me to be this way. She would tell me to live my life and be happy."

Our eyes glistened with unshed tears.

"I did some really terrible things that I'm not proud of Bonnie, but I know I can't reverse or change them so now I just have to do better. Be better."

I nodded. "You will, I know you will. I believe in you."

Caroline laughed to keep from fully crying. "I love you so much."

"I love you too."

"Ugh," Caroline wiped the corners of her eyes. "I didn't come here to cry, I came here to give you happy news."

"I thought you turning your emotions back on was the happy news."

"Well that's part of it but there's more. I talked to Elena earlier and she agreed that it'd be a good idea for us to get an apartment off campus so we can all live together again! Doesn't that sound great?"

 _Well…_

"Bonnie?" Caroline called when I didn't answer. "What do you think?"

"Umm…" Her face frowned at my lack of enthusiasm. "I mean don't get me wrong, I'm glad that you're back I just- do you really think it's a good idea to room together again? After everything that's happened maybe it's better for us to have our own personal space."

"What do you mean? After everything that's happened we should stay as close to each other as possible!"

By looking at her I could tell that this was something she really wanted to do. And in all honesty her words made perfect sense to me. The past few months ( _or years)_ have been crazy and Elena and Caroline are the closest thing I have to family, excluding my mom. I need them just like they need me so why not give this a try?

"You don't want to do it." Caroline sighed. "It's fine, Elena and I will just have to find someone to fill your place although it won't be the same."

"We won't be able to have late night girl talks, go to sleep together, wake up together, and have study sessions…" Caroline went on and on until I yelled her name.

"Okay." My tone softened. "I'm in."

"Yes!" Caroline squealed. "This is going to be so much fun! We can decorate the apartment and incorporate all of our own personal styles. Oh, and we can have a house warming once everything is together."

I laughed. "Caroline, slow down. We have to find an apartment first."

"Don't worry about that, I've already started looking."

I shook my head. "Of course you have."

"So," Caroline started. "What's this I heard about you and Damon seeing each other?"

"You know Caroline, it's getting kinda late and-" I faked a yawn. "I'm pretty tired."

Caroline smiled. "Nice try but you're not getting out of this conversation. I wanna know _all_ the juicy details."

I chuckled. "There are no juicy details _but_ I can tell you how all of this came about."

"Please do."

"Kick off your shoes and get comfortable."

We ended up on my bed with a blanket to cover our legs and a coffee mug in each of our hands. Then I began to tell her how I fell in love with Damon Salvatore.

* * *

 **Earlier In the Week**

Stefan walked into the boarding house and noticed how empty the place looked. Damon had been in and out of the house the past few days, mostly spending time with Bonnie whenever he got the chance.

"Damon?" Stefan called out.

"I'm upstairs." Damon replied.

Stefan began walking up the steps and made his entrance into Damon's room.

"Hey,"

"Hey, brother." Damon greeted.

"Where are you going?" Stefan asked.

Damon was fresh out of the shower with a white towel resting low on his hips.

"Hanging out with Bonnie."

"This is the third time this week you've hung out." Stefan pointed out.

Damon scoffed. "Is that a problem for you?"

"No, it's not a problem at all. It's just-"

Just then Damon snatched the towel off revealing everything. Stefan rolled his eyes and slightly turned to a different direction.

"Really?"

"What? It's nothing you've never seen before. And did you forget you're in my room?" Damon teased.

"Like I was saying," Stefan continued. "There's obviously something going on with you two."

Damon turned to Stefan and flashed him a smirk. "Like there's something going on between you and Caroline."

"What?" Stefan looked genuinely confused. "There's nothing going on between me and Caroline. Stop trying to change the subject."

Damon rolled his eyes.

It got quiet for a few seconds so Stefan spoke up again, trying to press more answers out of Damon.

"C'mon, I see the way you two look at each other."

Damon remained silent.

"You're honestly gonna stand here and act like you don't have feelings for her? You know Bonnie's a great girl… she deserves to be with someone who really knows that."

"You think I don't know that?" Damon got defensive. "I know that more than anyone. She's amazing."

Stefan smiled knowing he finally got Damon to open up.

"So?" Stefan questioned.

"So what?"

"Are you in love with her?"

"Maybe, I don't know." Damon answered in a nonchalant tone.

Stefan knew he was lying. "Maybe? You would know whether you loved her or not. It's a yes or no question."

Damon sighed. "Fine, Stefan. You win. I love her, okay? I'm in love with Bonnie."

This was the first time Damon had ever said that out loud and to someone else. It felt good.

Stefan grinned. "I'm happy for you."

"Don't get all mushy on me, Stefan." Damon grabbed his jacket and headed for the door.

"I gotta go."

"Have fun but not too much fun." Stefan put on his best fatherly voice.

"You really need to get a girlfriend." Damon scorned.

Stefan whispered to himself, "Maybe I do."

* * *

 **A/N: Damon loves her. I'm in my feels right now. *silently cries***

 **Thanks for reading and leave a comment!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Holy shit it's been 6 months since I updated. I'm so sorry. I could list all the excuses as to why it took me so long but what's the point?**

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

Today was move in day.

I had Matt and Damon helping me transport boxes of my possessions from the dorm to our new place. I didn't have as much stuff as Caroline but having one of my best friends and my boyfriend working together was a rare and nice sight.

Caroline made sure no one was helping her, she said she was very specific about how her things were packed and she didn't want anybody messing up her clothes or else she'd be killing someone.

Elena stayed behind at school and said she'd be moving her things in later on. She claimed she had some meeting to go to that all medical students had to attend but if you ask me, I secretly think she didn't want to run into Damon. Although they're both at peace with their previous relationship and they've both moved on, it's still a little awkward to see your ex boyfriend with your best friend. I can understand that.

When the boys first seen the apartment they had two completely different reactions which amused me. Matt walked in with a huge grin on his face and said. "This place is awesome!" at the same time Damon shrugged and said, "Not bad but I could of done better."

Caroline chose to ignore Damon's comment and thanked Matt for the compliment. She was the one that chose the apartment after all.

There were three bedrooms so none of us had to worry about sleeping on a couch. The kitchen was a nice spacious area with an island in the middle. The cabinets were a dark brown stain in contrast to our tan colored hardwood floors. Our windows were huge and gave off a lot of natural light so we really wouldn't need a bunch of lamps but knowing Caroline she would buy them just for decoration.

To get to my room you have to go up a short flight of stairs which I thought was really cool, while Elena and Caroline's rooms were on the first floor and in the back. I know Caroline was itching to start buying décor to make the place our own but we needed to get settled in before we started doing all of that. I told Caroline she should have been studying interior design instead of journalism and acting.

Once my bed was set up Damon and Matt came down from my room and said they had to go. A frown immediately plastered on my face.

"So soon?" I asked.

"Yeah we have a lot of things to do but I'll call you later to see how you've settled in." Damon replied.

"What exactly do you two have to do _together_?" I asked skeptically.

"Just…guy stuff. You wouldn't care to join." Matt chimed in.

 _I do not believe one word they've said_. "Oh, I didn't know you two started hanging out…when did this happen?"

"Shows how much you pay attention, Bon. We've been cool with each other for a while." Damon said while putting his arm around Matt awkwardly. I almost laughed.

I gave them both a look like _get real_ and they finally cracked.

"Okay! We're getting stuff for your birthday party." Damon confessed.

"What!?" That was not what I was expecting.

"Jesus Christ!" Caroline exclaimed. "You guys can't lie for shit."

"What were we supposed to do, she had us cornered?" Matt looked guilty.

"You guys could have just said you had to go and then left." Damon rolled his eyes at that.

"Great plan, Blondie." Damon said.

"Oh, shut up, Damon!"

"Wait a minute!" I interrupted. "Let's back things up a little. What birthday party? My birthday was months ago."

Damon and Matt turned to look at Caroline for an explanation.

She sighed. "I thought that it would be a good idea to throw you a birthday party since you weren't here for your birthday and we all missed it. You deserve it."

I smiled. "Care, that's sweet of you but I don't need to have a party. We can just have a girls night in."

"Nooo," Caroline whined. "We can have a girls night in anytime but a birthday party only happens once a year."

"Look, if Bonnie doesn't want to have a party then we won't throw her one." Damon directed towards Caroline. "It's up to her anyways."

"Well it wouldn't have been if you guys knew how to keep a surprise party a SURPRISE." Caroline gave them a death glare.

"Please Bonnie; I'm begging you to let me do this for you. I promise you'll have an amazing time."

I contemplated her words for a few seconds before I thought what the hell, I deserve a party.

"You promise?" I asked Caroline with a smirk on my face.

She clapped her hands together. "Yes! Yes! Yes!"

"Well okay then let's turn up!" Care screamed and ran over to me to give me a hug. I couldn't help but laugh as she knocked me back on the couch.

"I love you Bonnie Bennett!" Caroline let me go and helped me up and immediately went into planning mode.

"The party's back on so let's get to work. I need you guys to go pick up the decorations and booze while I call in about the cupcakes. Elena already has a list of people to invite so I'll remind her to send the notices out ASAP."

Matt and Damon sighed.

"I'll see you later, Bon."

"Thanks for helping out, Matt." I hugged him goodbye.

"I'll call you later." Damon said. Before he made it out the door he turned back around. "I almost forgot," he snapped his fingers. Pulling out a pair of earrings from his jean pocket, he handed them to me. "You left these at my place."

"Thanks. I had wondered where these disappeared to." He leaned down and gave me a close mouthed lingering kiss on the lips.

Caroline passed by us making a fake vomit noise while sticking her finger in her mouth. Damon just simply looked at her up and down and then scoffed.

"Bye babe." I slightly laughed.

"Bye, Bon-Bon."

* * *

The night before the party we all slept over at the boardinghouse.

It was like one big sleepover with the Mystic Falls gang, minus Jeremy and Tyler.

Caroline had awakened us earlier than I would have liked and told Elena and I she made us hair appointments. Everybody else was on setup duty so that everything would be prepared by the time guests arrived.

We were all sitting in salon chairs chatting about what we expected of the night and how excited we all were. Our outfits had already previously been picked out so the only thing left for us to do was style our hair and do makeup.

Elena ended up getting her hair straightened for the first time in a while and added extra blonde highlights. Caroline kept it simple by adding bouncy curls to her hair. And I got my hair straightened and cut into my signature bob.

I shook my hair from side to side and said in a dramatic tone, "The bob is back." The girls giggled.

Time was moving quickly. Before I knew it the house was decorated with balloons and streamers and there was glitter sprinkled all over the tables. Can't imagine whose idea that was…

The food table was full of pizza and other fatty snacks as well as white cupcakes with blue frosting topped off with the letter B for my name. Of course there was a ton of alcohol over in the bar area where people were allowed to make their own drinks.

Elena and Caroline both were wearing short dresses but I chose to wear a black crop top with a halter neck that showed off my flat stomach, matched with tight black pants and open toed black heels.

As soon as I entered the kitchen everyone had something to say.

"Wow, Bonnie you look amazing!"

"You're on fire, girl."

Damon was the last person to comment. He slowly crept up behind me and held my waist, whispering in my ear. "You look incredibly hot and I think you know you do."

I turned around and grinned. "Yeah, I do."

"Hmm," Damon moaned. "Your cockiness is turning me on.

"Damon." My face was flustered.

"I'm just being honest." And then he slapped my butt.

He would pay for that later.

The party was in full swing.

The music was blasting, people were dancing and drinking, and everything just felt _**normal**_ _. So this is what it's like to be young and carefree._

Somehow Elena and I ended up on top of a table dancing to Jordin Sparks "Double Tap" while people were cheering us on and no doubt posting a video of us on Snapchat.

While I was drinking water to cool off Damon pulled me aside and told me someone was here to see me. I gave him a quizzical look and asked who.

"Well only your favorite cousin."

I know that voice.

I turned around and seen Lucy Bennett walking towards me with a satisfied smile.

"Lucy?" I couldn't believe it. We walked towards each other until we met in the middle and embraced each other.

I delved right into asking questions. "I haven't seen you in so long, where have you been? How did you know I was having a party?"

"Whoa, one question at a time. I know I haven't been around but I've been traveling. And your boyfriend invited me."

I looked back at Damon and he winked.

"We have a lot to catch up on baby cousin. Especially the fact that you're dating a Salvatore now. I never thought I'd see the day." Lucy teased.

"Yeah, I know. Things are so different now. C'mon, let's get you a drink." I guided her towards the bar area. We ended up drinking and enjoying each other's company for a while until I excused myself to go find Damon.

Lucy went upstairs searching for a bathroom and ended up accidentally walking into Stefan's room. Stefan was standing outside on his balcony when he heard movement and checked to see who it was.

When Stefan's face appeared out of the dark room, Lucy jumped.

"I didn't mean to scare you." Stefan apologized.

"Is this your room? I was looking for the bathroom and I couldn't see where I was going."

"No problem, it's straight ahead."

"Thanks. If you don't mind me asking, what are you doing up here all alone when there's a party going on downstairs."

"Being anti social." Stefan joked. "Actually I was just thinking."

Stefan started walking back out to the balcony as Lucy followed.

"Must be pretty important."

"Not really." Stefan lied.

"You're thinking about a girl, aren't you?" Lucy picked up on his vibes.

"Ehh." Stefan replied.

Lucy chuckled. "That means yes. You're not thinking about the doppelganger girl, are you?"

Stefan sighed, "You're good."

"I thought you two had broken up?"

"We did. I mean we are but…nevermind."

"No," Lucy egged him on. "continue what you were going to say."

Stefan hesitated. "Even after all this time I don't think I ever truly got over her. And I hate myself for it."

"That's tough. Does she know you still have feelings for her?"

"No, I never actually told her. I'm good at playing the "just friends" card."

"Well how are you ever going to know how she feels if you don't say something." Lucy pointed out.

"I just wonder if it even matters anymore. I mean she chose my brother over me and then their relationship crumbled. It's funny, months ago I would have been ecstatic at seeing them broken up but now I'm just…"

"Now you're just what? Content?"

"Sort of. I mean I feel like I've made peace with the fact that Elena loved Damon and she probably always will but at the same time I'm still upset that our relationship failed. Even more so that she let it fail. We both did. And if we were true love or soulmates like I thought we were then why did this happen? We were supposed to be stronger than that."

"Well I don't know if I believe in soulmates but if you two really are then I'm sure you'll find your way back to each other."

Stefan looked at Lucy with furrowed brows. "You think so?"

"Yeah. And you shouldn't stress yourself out about it; I mean you can always date other girls in the meantime. What about Caroline?"

Stefan shook his head and laughed. "I love Caroline but we're just friends."

"You know I don't usually date white guys but if I did you'd definitely be at the top of my list. I'd do you for sure."

Stefan smiled. "Thanks, I guess."

At this moment Elena had went upstairs to go to the bathroom when she heard voices talking in Stefan's room. She came to a stop and listened to a little of what was said.

Hearing Lucy say she'd do Stefan made her feel a little wary but she let it go and kept moving.

"Well I should get going." Lucy said. "I'm gonna go say bye to Bonnie."

On the way out of Stefan's room Lucy ran into Elena.

"Hey, Lucy." Elena smiled.

Lucy stopped for a second and acknowledged Elena and then went on.

Stefan was coming out of his room when he came face to face with Elena.

"She doesn't like me very much, huh?"

"Nah, I don't think it's that, I just don't think she can get over the resemblance to Katherine."

Elena nodded.

"Would you like to go for a walk with me?"

That caught Elena off guard. "Um, yeah, sure."

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

I was drunk.

I dragged Damon up the stairs with me and into his room so that we could makeout and possibly do other things. He made me really happy by inviting Lucy to my party and I wanted to show him my appreciation.

I soon as I closed the door I jumped on him and our lips smashed together. He made is way backwards towards the bed and plumped down with me on top of him.

Damon broke the kiss for a second. "What's all this about? Not that I'm complaining."

I smiled sleepily. "You've been good and you made this night very fun for me so thank you."

"You're so very welcome." He said into my mouth.

His hands squeezed my hips as I continued to kiss him into oblivion. They worked their way down to my butt cheeks and onto my inner thighs. I sighed in pleasure.

I let him up so that I could start unbuttoning his shirt. We were both panting even though Damon didn't really need to breathe.

"You're drunk." Damon stated.

"I know."

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Yes."

Once his shirt was undone I grabbed his face and continued kissing him. Our tongues swirled together and I know we were probably making the nastiest smacking noises but I didn't care.

Not until someone opened the door.

"Oh shit, sorry." Lucy said.

I instantly got off of Damon. "Lucy," I exhaled out of breathe.

"I just came to say goodbye."

I wasn't turned on anymore, I was sad. "You're leaving?"

"Yeah I gotta get going but we'll see each other again, don't worry." Lucy assured me.

I climbed off the bed and went to give her a farewell hug. "Thanks for coming. Let's keep in contact, okay?"

"Sure thing. Here's my number." Lucy pulled out a piece of paper with a number written on it. "Call me anytime."

"See ya later, cuzzo. And Damon," Damon looked at Lucy. "If something happens to Bonnie, I'll come after you."

"Nothing will happen to her. She's in good hands."

* * *

 **(Stefan's POV)**

"It's a really nice night."

Elena and I were walking around the neighborhood as the party was still going on. When I seen her standing outside my bedroom, I impulsively asked her to walk with me. I could tell she was surprised I asked but I was glad she said yes.

"Yeah it is. A little chilly though." Elena replied.

Instinctively I took off my plaid shirt that was around my gray t shirt and draped it around her shoulders.

"It's not much but here you go."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

It stayed silent for a minute or two. It gave me a chance to admire the way she looked tonight. _She's so beautiful…_

Elena interrupted the silence. "How have you been?"

I laughed dryly. "You mean post ripper? I've been alright. What about you?"

"You mean since Damon and I broke up? Surprisingly I've been okay. I mean it hurt like hell to realize how screwed up our relationship was and to know that we couldn't fix it but it was for the best. We were completely toxic together. I know that now more than I ever did."

"You're not bothered by Damon and Bonnie being together?" I asked.

"It's definitely weird and something I never thought I'd see happen but…I can honestly say I'm happy for her. For the both of them really."

"That's very mature of you." I complimented.

She huffed out a deep breath. "I try to be."

"Elena, I owe you an apology."

Elena gave me a confused look. "What for?"

"For the way I treated you while my humanity was off. I forced myself on you like some dick head and that was completely disrespectful. I'm sorry."

"I know you're sorry. And I appreciate the apology but it wasn't necessary. I know you, Stefan. The real you would never intentionally hurt me."

The look on her face was familiar. I know this look. This is the look of someone in love.

"That's not an excuse. I knew what I was doing when I did it."

"Oh, Stefan. You're always so hard on yourself. When are you going to learn that none of us are perfect?" Elena teased.

I scoffed. "I'm definitely not perfect."

"And neither am I. So apology accepted." She said as she put her hand on my shoulder.

Her hand on my shoulder triggered something. The conversation Lucy and I had popped into my head. Specifically the part where I questioned the downfall of Elena and I's relationship.

I suddenly stopped walking and Elena stopped with me.

"Elena, why didn't our relationship work?" The question just rolled off of my tongue like I had no control. I heard her inhale out of surprise from my sudden question.

She stumbled over her words. "Because…I messed things up…I let me being sired get in the way…"

She looked down for a second and tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear. "I don't know if I want to talk about this."

"Can you please answer the question? I want to hear what you have to say. I promise I'll leave it alone afterwards." I pleaded.

She took a deep breath and said, "Honestly…I blamed you but I blame myself more. I let myself get caught up. Instead of just being honest and open with you like we promised we'd do, I swept everything under the rug until it was too late."

"Why did you blame me?"

"I was stupid. I mistook you being so adamant about me being human again as you not liking the person I'd become when really you were just trying to make me happy. I know that now."

Tears welled up in her eyes.

"I still love you." She whispered.

My hand came up and cradled her face. I wiped an escaped tear away with my thumb.

"I still love you too, Elena. I'll always love you…"

She smiled as she leaned into my hand and closed her eyes.

"But I can't be with you. At least not right now."

I saw her face fall.

"You need some time to be by yourself, heal from your relationship with Damon and I need to let go of some resentment I have." I explained.

She nodded and said she understood. I hated to let her down like this but I didn't want to jump into anything with her just yet.

I took her hand and moved a little closer to her.

"You know I got some advice today regarding you and I." She looked up at me with wide watery brown eyes. "I was told that if we were truly soulmates then we would find our way back to each other. Do you believe that?"

"Yes" her voice cracked.

"I believe that too." I kissed her hand.

"C'mon, let's go back to the party."

Our walk back to the house was quiet but our hands never disconnected.

 _I have hope for us._

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

After Lucy had left I went to the bathroom to freshen up and when I came back out there was a small white box on the bed.

"What this?" I asked Damon.

"I don't know, open it and see." He smirked.

Inside was a ring. It had a silver band with a beautiful yellow diamond in the middle.

"Oh my god, Damon."

"Don't freak out and run off, it's not an engagement ring. It's more of a promise ring."

I took it out of the box and placed it on the ring finger but on my right hand. I couldn't take my eyes off of it.

"This is beautiful, thank you so much."

I hugged him and he kissed my neck. "Happy birthday, Bonnie."

We made our way back downstairs and the party was clearing out. Everyone was telling me happy birthday on the way out and expressing how much fun they had.

I seen a classmate of mine stumbling towards the door. Obviously she was wasted.

"Hey, Sarah, you okay to make it home?" I asked.

"Oh yeah, I'm good. My friend is driving me back."

"Okay, be safe." We hugged.

"I almost forgot, your friend Kay wanted to make sure you got this." She handed me a card in a white envelope with no name on it.

"I don't know a Kay. Must have been somebody else."

"I could have sworn he said Kay. Wait, no, he said Kai."

My heart dropped to my stomach.

* * *

 **A/N: Kai will be returning.**

 **Leave a comment/review to let me know if you guys are still into this story.**

 **I have two different endings that I'm contemplating. One ending completes the story in full and the other would lead into a part 2 or sequel. Let me know your thoughts on this.**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N (please read): Hey. To everyone who's still rocking with this story (and new comers) thank you for reading and leaving comments, it means so much to me. I've been struggling with writing for this story the past few months because in all honesty I don't have the desire to write it anymore. As time goes on, I feel more & more disconnected from TVD, especially now that the show has ended. With that being said, I'm still going to push myself to finish this story because I made a promise in the beginning to never abandon you guys and I plan to keep that promise. I asked my readers awhile back if they'd like to see a sequel to this but for right now I'm going to say I don't see that happening. I'm sorry if this is disappointing news to anyone. Anyways, here's chapter 13. Not my best writing but I felt obligated to publish something because it's been so long.**

* * *

 **(Bonnie's POV)**

 _I knew I had fucked up._

 _I could practically hear the displeasure in his tone, the way his words flew out at me like knives._

 _I could see his temper flaring by the way his muscles tightened and his blue eyes blazed a hole through me._

 _I could trace the frown lines on his forehead that slithered down to his flat, stern mouth._

 _But most importantly, beyond the anger, I could see I had hurt him._

" _Are you breaking up with me?"_

 _He had his hands on his hips, staring at me for what felt like an eternity before answering._

" _I don't know. All I know is that I don't want to be around you right now so you can let yourself out." He motioned towards the door before walking away._

 _I waited until I got into my car and drove away to let the tears spill over._

* * *

 **12 hours earlier…**

I had just gotten out of one of my classes when I decided to eat lunch back at the apartment.

The birthday party my friends threw for me last week was amazing but Spring break was over and it was back to school for us college kids.

To my surprise, Caroline was inside standing against our kitchen bar. I couldn't quite explain her expression but it looked like she had some stuff on her mind.

"Hey, what are you doing here?"

"I live here."

I playfully scowled at Caroline. "You know that's not what I meant, don't be a smart-ass."

In the kitchen I started taking out all of the ingredients I needed for a sandwich when I noticed she hadn't replied to my comeback. Something was off with her.

"Is everything okay?"

She took an unnecessary deep breath. "Well not really…I mean I came home to change my shirt after some idiot spilled coffee all over me," she rolled her eyes. "but then when I was looking for a different shirt to wear I found this."

A mini heart attack erupted inside my chest when I seen that Caroline was holding the birthday card Kai had left for me the night of my party. I had stashed it away at the bottom of one of my drawers, thinking no one would ever see it. Guess I was wrong.

"Caroline, what were you doing going through my stuff?"

"I told you I was looking for a shirt and you know you have cute tank tops! So don't try to turn this around on me. Why do you have a card from _Kai_ and why didn't I know about this!?"

"I haven't told anyone about it, not even Damon." I mumbled guiltily.

"And why not?"

"Because I don't want you guys to worry. I can handle this."

"You shouldn't have to handle this on your own, you've been through enough. Hell, we all have which means we're all in this together."

I sighed. "Care, this isn't High School Musical. I appreciate your concern but I've got everything under control."

"In the card it said he wanted to meet you on today's date. You're not actually going to go, right?"

"I need to go."

"You're kidding me. Bonnie, the guys a complete psychopath! What if you get hurt or worse? Nope. This isn't a good idea."

Caroline was pacing the room which was making me a little nervous. I had to calm her down or else she wouldn't let me out of her sight for the rest of the day.

"You don't understand, I need to do this. I need to show him that I'm not afraid and that I don't need a posse to take him down. If I don't show up or if I bring someone along he'll just label me a coward."

"It doesn't matter what he thinks, what matters is that you're safe and far away from him." Caroline checked her phone before groaning. "Ugh, I have to get back to campus but we'll talk more about this later. Promise me you won't go?"

I nodded my head. "Okay."

She gave me a quick hug before flashing out the door.

Suddenly I had lost my appetite. Knowing I had just straight up lied to my best friends face made me feel horrible but I had already made up my mind. I was going to meet Kai…alone.

* * *

The address Kai sent me turned out to be at a semi old building that was shut down for reasons unknown. I figured he would pick somewhere reclusive but this was a little unusual even for him. As I was scoping out the place I heard a noise around the back of the building.

I followed the noise and stopped when I noticed a figure with their back facing me. As soon as I seen the person I knew it wasn't Kai.

"Damon?"

He turned around in a slow, dramatic fashion with a fake yet cynical smile plastered on his face.

"What are you doing here? How are you even here right now?" I was stunned.

"I could ask you the same thing, _Bonnie._ " He said my name in disdain.

 _The only way Damon could have known about this is if-_

"Caroline told you." It wasn't a question but a statement.

"Well you surely didn't tell me." That fake smile of his was still present but it was slowly starting to dissipate. "Care to explain?"

I parted my lips to speak but that's when Kai decided to show up.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't my pals from 1994. The trio is back together again!"

At that moment Damon and I gave Kai the same look of pure hatred. I walked over to stand near Damon so that it looked as if it was two against one. But in reality, Damon wasn't really on my side in this particular moment.

Kai chuckled. "You just couldn't resist bringing back up, could you? I had no plans to hurt you, Bonnie, I hope you know that. I just wanted to talk to you alone."

"I didn't ask Damon to come," I quickly insured. "He just showed up."

I took a chance and glanced at Damon from the corner of my eye but all of his attention was on Kai.

"Well let me just get straight to the point so that I'm not wasting anyone's time. Have you considered my proposal?"

I inwardly sighed. "No, I already told you I wouldn't do it."

"That's a shame. I guess I'll just have to keep popping up until you say yes." He made sure to emphasize the word 'popping' with a loud P.

"Really?" Damon chimed in. "That's your plan? To be a pest until you get what you want? What kind of a villain are you?"

"Cute. Real cute, Damon. But I'm not a villain, I'm a warlock and I have my ways of making people do things they wouldn't normally do."

 _That doesn't sound good._

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means I can simply threaten one of your friend's lives in order for you to agree. I let someone you care about live and you help me. You scratch my back, I scratch yours."

"Nice try but that won't work."

 _At this point I was putting on a front. One of my biggest fears is Kai going after someone I love in order to get to me. It would be all my fault if something happened. I can't let that happen._

Kai smirked. "Oh really? So you wouldn't give in if I got a hold of _Elena?_ Or maybe that pretty blonde friend of yours. I know you couldn't resist saving your little boyfriend-"

"That's it." Damon growled and started to go after Kai.

"No, stop!" I held onto Damon's wrist and he stopped but not before snatching away from me.

"Looks like I hit a nerve there." Kai cracked on Damon.

"Wait a minute. What if we made a deal?"

Damon turned to me and looked as if to say _what the fuck are you doing?_

Kai grinned without showing teeth. "I'm listening."

"If I agree to help you create a new dimension, you have to go there _alone_ and never come back."

"No. No way." Damon was already shaking his head before I even finished my sentence.

"I'm agreeing with Damon on this one. You can't get rid of me that easily."

"Okay...what if-"

"Bonnie, you're not doing anything for this American psycho."

" _Damon,_ " I snarled. "just let me handle this on my own please."

"Fine. Go ahead and make a deal with the devil. I'm done with this."

In the blink of an eye Damon was already half way gone.

"Damon!"

He didn't stop. He kept walking as if he didn't hear me. I jogged a little towards the front of the building but he was nowhere to be found.

I heard footsteps coming up behind me.

"What is it with the Salvatore's that makes girls so weak and pathetic? Maybe it's the hair…"

Kai continued to ramble in the background but his voice was nothing but white noise to my ears. My heart was clenching in my chest and I couldn't help but feel guilty about what just happened.

I told Kai this "meeting" was officially over and he replied with something along the lines of looking forward to seeing me soon. Can't say I feel the same way.

* * *

By the time I reached the Salvatore house the evening sky had turned into darkness. When I reached the entrance I took the initiative to open the door without knocking.

"Damon! I know you're here. Where are you?"

From the top of the stairs Damon answered, "what do you want, Bonnie?"

"Why did you just leave like that? I was calling after you but you just sped off."

Damon came down the stairs and went straight for the bar.

"You said you wanted to handle it on your own so I left you to it. You obviously didn't want or need my presence, seeing as how you couldn't tell me what was going on in the first place. I had to hear from Blondie that you were _secretly_ meeting up with Kai of all people. Do you know how that made me feel?"

"Look...I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the card and everything but I knew if I told you, you would try to talk me out of it or come along. I just felt like I needed to face him on my own."

"It's an ego thing, I get it. But what if something had happened to you? What if he kidnapped you again or did something much worse. None of us would know where you were and I would've been going out of my mind trying to figure out what happened to you. Did you think about that?"

I hung my head down in regret. I didn't need to speak. We both knew he was right.

"You and I," he waved his finger between us. "Are supposed to be a couple. Now correct me if I'm wrong but when two people are in a relationship they're supposed to be honest with each other. We have to trust each other, Bonnie."

"I do trust you." I whispered.

"No you don't. If you did we wouldn't be having this conversation right now."

"I never meant to be deceitful...I just need you to try and understand where I'm coming from. Kai is a threat to us all but he's essentially my problem. If it comes down to protecting myself or you guys, I know what my choice will be."

Damon shook his head in disappointment. "I thought you had gotten past this."

"Past what?"

"You being a martyr!" The rise in volume caused me to jump.

"After everything we've been through in the prison world...all the sacrifices you've made, and yet you still came out strong. Now you're reverting back to being the scapegoat."

"That is _not_ what I'm doing."

"Yeah, alright, keep telling yourself that."

I scoffed.

"If I can't trust you not to go behind my back and do things like this then there's really no point in us being together."

"Are you breaking up with me?"

He had his hands on his hips, staring at me for what felt like an eternity before answering,

"I don't know. All I know is that I don't want to be around you right now so you can let yourself out." He motioned towards the door before walking away.

I waited until I got into my car and drove away to let the unwanted tears spill over.

* * *

Bonnie walked into the apartment slowly to see Elena and Caroline in the living room.

"Hey, Bon. We got takeout and left you some-"

Elena froze seeing Bonnie's tear streaked face.

"What happened?"

Caroline looked a little guilty, having an idea of what might of happened.

Elena walked towards Bonnie but she dashed to the bathroom and locked the door.

Elena looked over at Caroline as confused as ever, having no knowledge of the Kai, Bonnie, and Damon situation.

Caroline sighed, knowing she would have to fill Elena in and fix whatever happened between Bonnie and Damon.

* * *

 **A few days later**

Whitmore was having their annual charity drive where students could donate clothes, used items, books, and canned food. Caroline took this as the perfect opportunity to get Damon and Bonnie in the same room so they could talk.

Eventually Bonnie told Elena and Caroline what went down and Caroline apologized for the part she played in all of it but Bonnie didn't have the energy to express any anger towards her. Since the fight, Bonnie hadn't worked up the courage to go see Damon and Damon definitely hadn't made an effort to reach out to her, leaving it up to Caroline to fix.

Stefan wanted to help with Caroline's plan so he offered to donate a bunch of old clothes he never would wear again but the catch was the girls had to come to the boardinghouse to collect the stuff. Of course Bonnie refused knowing Damon would be at the house but Caroline assured her he would be out at the time.

Bonnie dragged herself out of bed and headed to Mystic Falls with Elena in the driver's seat and Caroline in the passengers. Once they arrived, Bonnie breathed a sigh of relief at the absence of Damon's blue camaro.

Stefan was helping the girls pile boxes of his belongings into the car when he noticed Elena was struggling with one of them. Right before the box slipped out of her fingers, Stefan swooped in and picked it up.

"I got it."

"Oh my god, thank you."

Stefan grinned. "No problem."

Elena stood staring at his backside a little longer than necessary. Caroline came up next to Elena and bumped her shoulder.

"Can you two be any more obvious?"

"What?" Elena said.

Caroline walked off laughing.

Bonnie was inside going through a box of trinkets when she felt his presence as soon as he stepped in the door. They locked eyes and she unintentionally held her breath, wondering what his reaction to her being there would be.

Damon simply passed by Bonnie and said "hey" which she replied the same. He went in the kitchen and Bonnie finally exhaled but she didn't feel any better. Caroline had told her Damon wouldn't be here and now there was nowhere for her to run.

Stefan came inside and asked Bonnie where Damon was and she pointed towards the kitchen. He purposely asked Bonnie to tell Damon that he needed his help and to send him outside. Inwardly Bonnie groaned.

When Damon passed by Bonnie again, she cleared her throat to get his attention but that didn't work so she had to call his name. He turned around with a nonchalant expression.

"Stefan wants your help outside."

Damon just nodded and headed outside. Bonnie's shoulders sunk. She hated tip toeing around Damon and things being awkward but she didn't know if she was ready to talk in fear of him actually dumping her.

"What's up?" Damon greeted Stefan.

Stefan closed the trunk of the car and leaned against it. "You should talk to her."

Damon blinked. "Hasn't anyone ever told you not to stick your nose in other people's business?"

"I'm serious. Don't let this drag out longer than it needs to be. It's obvious you're crazy about Bonnie, so do what you gotta do to work things out."

"Who's to say I won't just break up with her?"

"I know you, Damon. You don't give up that easy. Especially not with someone you love."

Damon would never admit it out loud but he knew Stefan was right. He needed to talk to his girl.

Bonnie was still inside, avoiding running into Damon, when the man himself walked in and came straight up to her.

"Can we talk?"

Elena and Caroline took that as their cue to leave. They announced they were going to the grill and that they could all meet up later.

Bonnie sat on the couch and waited for Damon to start speaking.

He started by reassuring Bonnie that he didn't want to breakup and that he never actually considered it. Damon also told her he understood her reasoning for not telling him about the meet up with Kai but that he didn't like how she went about things.

Bonnie apologized several times and promised to never do it again.

They made a pact that whatever came their way they would handle it. Together.

"I should go. Elena and Caroline are probably waiting for me at the grill."

"You know I could make you something to eat."

Bonnie laughed. "Like what? You can't cook."

"Pancakes." Damon smirked.

"Oh wow. That actually sounds kind of good right now."

In the kitchen Damon was whipping up the pancake batter while Bonnie was looking for things to add in it.

"Cinnamon?"

"No."

"Blueberries?"

"Nuh uh."

"Chocolate chips?"

"Nope."

"Oh, c'mon! How can you not like chocolate chips?"

"Simple, I'm a vampire. I only like blood and bourbon."

Bonnie rolled her eyes.

"The only way I'll eat the chocolate chips is if you feed them to me."

"Okay."

 _That was too easy,_ Damon thought.

Bonnie stuck one in his mouth and watched Damon as he chewed.

"What does it taste like to you?"

"Nothing. But you on the other hand," Damon took Bonnie's left hand and sucked on her thumb seductively. "Taste delectable."

Bonnie grinned and blushed at the same time.

When Damon let her hand go, she made the move to softly stroke Damon's bottom lip.

 _Your lips are sinful,_ Bonnie thought.

Damon's eyes turned a shade darker than usual, indicating his arousal.

He captured Bonnie's lips in a heated kiss which made her gasp in pleasure. She was lifted onto the kitchen counter where Damon's hands remained on her hips. She wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled him as close as possible. He moved down her neck, leaving a trail of sweet and warm kisses.

 _Déjà vu?_ Bonnie thought, as her mind wandered to the almost sex dream she had about Damon way back when.

"Wait, what about the pancakes?" Bonnie remembered.

"Screw the pancakes."

Damon sped them up to his bedroom and locked the door.

 _Time to do some making up._


End file.
